If you truly want help with your thought processes on this topic. You really need to make arrangements to see a therapist....face to face. And be honest and straight forward as you are here tonight.

I'm sure everyone here would support you in doing this and would support your progress in any way we can. But you really MUST see a therapist. This is not something anyone on this forum can resolve for you.

I commend you for your effort to step forward and seek help, but the answers are within your own psyche and we can only support you in your therapy. We can't resolve your inner conflicts for you.

Make some phone calls....tomorrow. Or call your local crisis line and they will hook you up with someone to talk to. There is a reason why you are having these thoughts....you NEED to see someone...the consequences of acting out your fantasies and thoughts will ruin your life and the lives of others.

Talk to someone....SOON!!!

SD

thank you for your advice. i do really appreciate it. i have thought about calling the crisis line and seeking a therapist. the only problem is i cant afford an expensive therapist. it is true i have had urges to play out my fantasies, but never have and dont think i ever will. but i agree with you that i need to speak to someone. i dont knwo if you are in the vancouver area, but if you are, i would greatly appreciate any advice or numbers you can give me of who to talk to

Therapy may not be as expensive as you think. There are many out there who will work with you on that. They work on a sliding fee scale and will see you at a rate that you can afford to pay. That is why I mentioned calling a crisis line. They can often refer to to the resources that will best meet your individual needs.

Believe me....I am not rich...and I still see my therapist twice a week....and have done so for many years. Explain your situation....economics and needs, and I am sure they will find a way to get you some help.

I am not located in your area...but will make some inquires on your behalf.

SD

Brokenmind,

Not sure where you are from, but if you are a Canadian resident, you can have it covered by your provincial health plan if you have a referral from your GP.

Holly

Duh, okay I see now that you are in the Vancouver area. Just go to your GP or to a clinic and explain your situation and that you want to get some help. Ask them for a referral to a psychiatrist and explain that you can't afford one. I'm in MB and that's what I did, and I don't pay for it.

Good Luck!

Holly

not a therapist, but from my angle, maybe you have already had that kind of sexual experience, and maybe you don't consciously remember it? I agree that a licensed therapist who has experience with these sorts of issues would be the best place to go. Good luck and don't beat yourself up.