My good friend (and by now I have very few because I isolate when feeling emotional pain) told me she feels an edgy energy from me and wondered if I was pissed off at her. she knows I've been going through therapy and has been one of my best supporters. However, I can't even find the words to explain to her how I feel and how things are. This is probably one of two people in my life I could share with and receive love from, but my defenses won't let me. I am so frustrated with myself! All I want is to be able to talk openly with my friend and feel her love and support, but all I can do is push her away. What would be an easy way to let her know I'm in an awful place emotionally without having her think I'm acting like a victim and feel pity for me?