My question is rather simple and yet too complex for me to figure out: what do I say in therapy? I started seeing a therapist when I was a teen for anorexia (alongside OCD, anxiety, and depression, but that all falls under the ED umbrella), and have been in treatments since then. Now, I'm doing rather well ED-wise (compared to where I have been in the past) but I rely on consistent therapy sessions to maintain accountability and progression. Really, I can only afford to see my T every two to three weeks, but she is great! She lets me e-mail her constantly and, even if she doesn't reply, I love knowing she is there. I have said so much to her through e-mails without censoring a word, but then I sit in her office, and my mind goes blank. All of the thoughts suddenly turn off and I have no idea what to talk about! Part of anxiety involves having no life outside school, so there aren't really normal things to fall back on. So, I'm stuck sitting there, shrugging, trying to figure out why I can say so much in an e-mail and so little with my mouth!
There has to be some way to prepare for a session, to figure out what to say when my mind goes blank, but after six years in therapy, I still haven't figured it out. Until now, I always had ED thoughts as a fallback option!
So, I'm sorry for the lengthy question, but any advice on how to figure out what to say to really open up in therapy (oh, and trust is a big issue in my life, so clearly opening up never came naturally to me
)?
glad to meet you & glad you posted! This may be overly simple suggestion, but my first thought that comes to mind, I wonder if you could try writing out everything you would say in email, and taking that to a session? Even if at first just discussing what would've been emailed in person by reading off paper? That could be a way to ease into being more comfortable discussing things face to face possibly. I know it's hard, I can relate to feeling almost frozen in the office, but my mind reeling as soon as home. Best luck to you, hope this helps a little.
