Dear Butterfly Warrior:

One of the most incredible journeys we will take in life is that of going deep inside and discovering why.....therapy is just one path to self discovery and healing....there are a myriad of other paths....But perhaps you are at a pivotal juncture in your therpay and subconsciously you are afraid to take that step??? And that is okay.....just know that you have a choice....

S

feb. stinks! could be that... or who knows... just trust it'll get better.

robin

Sarah.. I think you're right.... im sure something is up... there is stuff i want to let out but im afraid as well....

Yeh Robin.. it does.... lol

Well here's my thoughts on being triggered--from a somatic therapist. Get lots of safety. Without it, it's hard to move on.

I think I mentioned this a while back. When I feel myself being triggered, sometimes I just sit with my therapist finding ways to feel safe imaginally or tracking my body sensations. Sometimes to get me started, we'll have a conversation on a topic I enjoy talking about.

I've seen amazing things with my clients and myself without even knowing what we're working on. We don't actually need to find out why we're triggered (it's how the brain is wired). When we get triggered, it's really a good way to deal with our stuff w/o even being able to put a finger on it--we don't need to talk about it, only until and if we feel safe to do so. Because when you deal only with how it shows up in your body and bring awareness to that...it helps to move the stuff out.

So this means, not talking more about the negative stuff that's in your head. It's calming down first and feeling that safe feeling again.

This is the work...it's not the barriers to the work...it is the work.

Does this make sense?

Shrinklady

I rememeber discussing this before and it helps to have the reminders. I really often forget ... lol...

why is it so hard to feel safe even when you want too.. lol.. or think you want to but something there is saying no no no nothing is safe.... not feeling it...

the one thing i appreciate about my therapist is that she hasn't tried to push me at all.. she's just been going with the flow of whatever i put out there ...

mostly i know kinda whats bugging me... i still miss my dad.. i keep worrying he is going to die on me and me not talking to him but than im too angry and i can't deal with it and blah.. it's a whole state of ummm... oh what is it called.. when you're stuck between two points that are equally difficult.... and its bring a lot of tension into my body but i wonder WHY NOW.... makes me worry like is my body sensing someting in the universe... gee that sounds so new age.. but yeh...

thanks for your thoughts again.. it really helps...

There's a lot of 'no no it's not safe' isn't there? End up in that palce a lot myself actually...

Also, family stuff... ugg... do we have to go there?? LOL... sisters... blech...

Scott

lol.. yes....

but hey... I did something... i went into the office.... i took a deep breath... as she spoke about im not sure what... lolol.... i just looked around and listened in one ear but just felt in the other.. so... while she was looking at my mood charts... I decided to go for it... i shared my big dilemia issue with my father and issues around that.. than she asked me this question about how trauma/abuse has affected my past, present, beliefs, etc type thing.. meaning something or other and I actually gave her m y 5 page written answer to that question I wrote for my therapist last year who gave me a similar assignment.. she had given it back to me cause i complained that it wasnt fair that the 'new therapist' gets to have this stuff and she doesnt even know me... .LOL.... so yeh.... but now im freaked out cause I dont rememeber anything I wrote on it and the original is on my jump drive.. and um.. my USB ports arent working.. so yeh.... LOL.... but it felt kinda good and felt safe but towards the end I sorta felt myself dissocatiate and the time just sorta dissapeared and the session ended so oddly, im not sure if it was me but I was just kinda confused like it just kinda ended like okay see you next week and it was like umm.. okay... what just happened?/ urgh... oh well.... i survived... lol....

Butterfly Warrior:

I sure can relate to the dissociation you experience....quite the coping mechanism.....for both of us.....

S