I´m not sure anyone remembers me.
I have been here on and off since 2010 but I don´t write much. Sometimes it´s difficult because English is not my language.
Many of you have helped me enormously through bad times, I´m afraid I have not been as much help, I´m scared to write something wrong because of language misunderstanding. But I try, even though I have to use google translate. I know that many of you have experienced transference and i´t helps a lot to hear from you.
I´m transferencing again with old T. It feels wonderful, but i´m also scared of it. Something she said has hurt me before. My emotions were all stirred up and was out of my mind for months. I stopped seeing her. I was all alone with those crazy feelings until I met new T at the the psych ward almost 2 years ago. When I became better I felt I had to see old T again, despite all, we had been doing good work together before the storm.
I have been seeing her since August and recently I have felt the transference is coming back. I love her so much. I used to see her at the hospital and that was free of charge, now I see her at her private clinic. That is expensive and I can only see her every other week.
I also see NewT the other week and I´m doing group therapy with my psychiatrist once a week. But it´s not the same. I miss old T terribly between sessions. What do you do when you miss your T and can’t see him/her.
Thank you for reading,
Little Me
