I think it's cool that you did that. One time early on I took off my shoes without thinking and put my feet up on the couch. Then I realized and apologized for putting my feet on the couch But T said it was fine, so I've been taking off my shoes and putting up my feet ever since!

Wow to be that comfortable!!!

(((BLT)))

I'd LOVE to put my feet up on the couch. That would be awesome!

(((SCARS))

It only took 5+ years!

That story totally made me smile!

I take my shoes off all the time and lay down on the settee it's much more comfortable

Hi Liese,

When I began to sit on the floor with T I took my shoes off first because with 4 inch heels it's really hard to get back up again with any dignity LOL.

The thing is ... I'll only do that if I have stockings or socks on and not if I am barefoot... even though I almost always have a good pedicure.

My T does not take his shoes off though. My oldT would occassionally walk around without his shoes but he had socks on.

I am really glad that you were comfortable enough to do that and also that you sit on the floor. I found it helpful at times although I don't do it often. Mostly because I know T has a bad back and it hurts him to sit there.

TN

it is MY T who takes her shoes off and sits cross legged, with her feet on the couch!!!!!!

Once i said to her "glad you are comfortable, make yourself at home".

Somedays.

Somedays

I did that once with old T. I just sat on the couch, took my shoes off and put my feet up on the couch. I remember she looked at my shoes and then at me and smiled. (Oh dear, I am tearing up typing this) I guess she must have been thinking that she was glad I was so comfy. I never said anything. I figured I deserved it after all the money I paid her when she stopped taking insurance!

I have had my shoes off a number of times in therapy, but it was usually because I was wearing flipflops in the Summer, then had a panicked reaction about my feet being exposed...so I literally brought socks and slipped them on. Silly, I know, but I'd also change out of a tank top and into at least a mid-sleeved shirt, no matter how hot it was, because I dunno, I just felt toxic and the less of me T had to see, it felt the better. There was once or twice I've taken my shoes off when sitting on the floor and T has actually slipped his off a couple of times too. We haven't talked about it, really, except the one time where I was having an anxiety attack over another part wanting the shoes off and me wanting them on, lol. OK, I'm crazy, I admit it. However, T comments like crazy on my socks, because I usually wear casual shoes with patterned socks and he will notice the patterns or my obsessive matching it with some other part of my outfit. In fact, Monday, he asked he what part of my outfit the socks matched with, because he thought they didn't.

Uh, yeah, I'm making my T and myself both sound really weird, huh??? Errrr, nevermind.

But it's great you felt so comfy, Liese!!!

Liese, that is so cute. Actually, this whole thread is cute. I loved your comment to your T, Somedays, and kmay your reasoning about "deserving" it cracked me up. Gotta see the humor in therapy at times.

I've never taken my shoes off in therapy, since I don't like to be barefoot, and I only ever wear socks with my boots (my other shoes are all sandals, or dress shoes which I don't wear to therapy), and unlacing the boots is a tedious process. T is barefoot about half the time, though. I don't think she likes shoes.

Hi,
I always take my shoes off with my current T. I like to curl my feet on the chair under me. I have noticed that my T does the same! It feels more relaxed!

((Somedays))
Thats brilliant! I love the comment
as it is so similar to the banter between my
T and myself. I can picture us having
just the same dialogue!!

Liese
good for you..wish we could be that spontaneous
T often encourages me to take my shoes off to kind of feel the ground below me and then its after much persuasion from her to me
still cant be spontaneous with taking the shoes off and i still very britishly and politely ask please may i take my shoes off and thats only when i'm desperate too or i will take them off but then apologise profusely because my socks are very 'loud'
we would so like to curl up on her chairs cos they are like mini couches...maybe someday we are only at the start of year 3 with her so who knows

Hi Everyone,

I asked newT if I could take off my shoes and put my feet on the couch when I started noticing my thighs were aching each time I sat on her couch. It helped, so now I almost always take off my shoes unless, for some reason, I feel the need to act more dignified or am too anxious to relax that much. Of course, I am sure to wear slip on shoes so if I start feeling anxious and am tempted to dart out the door I can quickly slip them back on.

deeplyrooted

Am not really good at the whole sponataeity thing in therapy.

Pingu, my T often encourages me to take my shoes off so I can feel the ground beneath me feet.
Occasionally I have asked if I can take my shoes off so i can sit cross-legged on the floor or curl up and make myself even smaller! but it's only been in the last year (even though I have been seeing her for 3 years...).

I think through most movements very carefully and we have been working on me being able to move about and take up space in the room.

Think it's great you acted spontaneously

I always take my shoes off when I'm in therapy. I don't know why, but I do. Once I was wearing an outfit that required shoes that weren't easy on/easy off. I also had a sweater on that day. I arrived and took off my jacket. Then a few minutes later I took off my sweater. I was having trouble speaking when I realized I still had my shoes on, so I took them off, too. T asked "anything else you're planning on taking off?" It was the first time she commented like that, and I about died!

My old T had light colored carpet and requested that everyone take their shoes off. I liked that and would often sit on the couch cross legged.

The only trouble was those few times I freaked out and wanted to bolt and run away, or leave with a grand exit of some sort... it kind of cramped my style to have to stop and sort out my shoelaces before I could make my dramatic exit

I also have to take my shoes off at new T's place but I would never put my feet up on his furniture because I'm so on edge being there. I do leave my shoes with the laces loosened so if I do need to make a hasty exit I can jump into my shoes and make for the door!

I do my therapy on the couch ala Sigmund style and usually take my shoes off. I'd go in my PJs if I didn't have to dart across one of the busiest roads in the city to get from my car to T's office

(R2G)

I never take my shoes off unless they're flip flops. I usually wear complicated shoes :P. until recently though, I noticed I became a lot more comfortable with T then I realized. It was the end of a session last month, and while she was at her desk scheduling my appt for this month, I climbed on top of her couch chair and sat backwards while I proceeded to lean on her desk and chat for the last few minutes. :P nothing too big but a little embarrassing for me. She, on the other hand, was like oh girl please it's no problem I love that you're so comfortable blah blah blah. Typical T response :P lol

Liese, what a neat story! It took me 6+ months to take my shoes off with my t because i was afraid she would not be okay with me doing that.

spontaneously i have been laying on her couch on occasion totally curled up out of exhaustion. it's strange to get that level of spontaneously intimate. good work!

I really enjoy reading this thread.
I met with my pastoral counselor today and realized that I have been seeing her for a couple months now and taking off my shoes has never crossed my mind even though I nearly always take them off when I am with my therapist. It will be interesting to see if this changes with time.

deeplyrooted