do you kind of feel like an outsider? i just don't feel like i'm not "bad" enough to be an "alcoholic". silly, but almost like i'm not "good" enough to be an alcoholic? i know it sounds wierd, but it's my reality.
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understand (((CD))) big 
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s
(((((( CD )))))
Yes I think I understand that feeling too. As if, oh I’m not a derro in a doorway homeless clutching a bottle of cheap plonk and therefore the alcoholism isn’t really that bad and not deserving of understanding and support like others who are ‘true’ alcoholics. And if I say I am people will think that it’s just attention seeking
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I’m not alcoholic now – but I accept in retrospect I was pretty much that way over most of my life – one day drunk one day hungover one day straight and staring reality in the face which was so crap that off I’d go again.
I think I was lucky, I started going straight from sober to hungover without the merry bit in the middle and the hangovers got so bad that it just wasn’t worth it anymore – my body stopped being able to metabolise the stuff so it was easy for me to just stop. (Mind you, this after 30 years of solid drinking.) I do know though just how difficult it is to stop, despite the best intentions in the world. I wish you all the best in your struggle.
LL
Yes I think I understand that feeling too. As if, oh I’m not a derro in a doorway homeless clutching a bottle of cheap plonk and therefore the alcoholism isn’t really that bad and not deserving of understanding and support like others who are ‘true’ alcoholics. And if I say I am people will think that it’s just attention seeking
.I’m not alcoholic now – but I accept in retrospect I was pretty much that way over most of my life – one day drunk one day hungover one day straight and staring reality in the face which was so crap that off I’d go again.
I think I was lucky, I started going straight from sober to hungover without the merry bit in the middle and the hangovers got so bad that it just wasn’t worth it anymore – my body stopped being able to metabolise the stuff so it was easy for me to just stop. (Mind you, this after 30 years of solid drinking.) I do know though just how difficult it is to stop, despite the best intentions in the world. I wish you all the best in your struggle.
LL
thanks (((Morgs))) and (((LL))). LL, welcome back!
Hi again CD,
I hope you don't mind my saying this (and please forgive me if you do), but I think right now you have these AA folks on a little bit of a pedestal. And I say that as someone who puts anyone on a pedestal when they appear to hold out hope of having the answers I have been looking for. I did that with the AA folks, too. Fortunately, they survived the eventual and inevitable fall from the pedestal, because along the way, as I was going to meetings and doing steps, we were building relationships, so it all worked out. You are not "too bad" to be an alcoholic. And if you think you are, pick someone in the meeting you feel safe enough to ask, and talk to them about it and see what they say. And if you don't feel safe enough with anyone yet, keep going to meetings until there is someone you feel safe enough with. I guarantee you that your question has been asked before. I've heard it before.
Peace,
SG
I hope you don't mind my saying this (and please forgive me if you do), but I think right now you have these AA folks on a little bit of a pedestal. And I say that as someone who puts anyone on a pedestal when they appear to hold out hope of having the answers I have been looking for. I did that with the AA folks, too. Fortunately, they survived the eventual and inevitable fall from the pedestal, because along the way, as I was going to meetings and doing steps, we were building relationships, so it all worked out. You are not "too bad" to be an alcoholic. And if you think you are, pick someone in the meeting you feel safe enough to ask, and talk to them about it and see what they say. And if you don't feel safe enough with anyone yet, keep going to meetings until there is someone you feel safe enough with. I guarantee you that your question has been asked before. I've heard it before.
Peace,
SG
nah, i don't mind at all, especially since it's the truth. i know that ... i'm just a little intimidated at the time being. i'll come around ... i hope. thanks for your words, i do appreciate it.