According to professional standards, it's OK to end therapy with a client as long as you give the client appropriate referrals.

Personally I think it's terrible form to end abruptly with no explanation. On the other hand, if a T does this to you, they're really sparing you the worse fate of staying in therapy with a T that doesn't know what to do with you and/or can't handle their own issues. I can understand why you feel hurt and angry, though. Almost anyone would feel that in your position.

Hi Chezza,

I am so sorry to hear this has happened to you and I know you must be struggling with some pretty strong emotions.

It sounds like a pretty abrupt way of leaving things from the Ts end.

I agree with you that there should be another party involved to help assist the client who has been discharged from care. We are already struggling with the issues that bring us to therapy in the first place and having a therapist just terminate care can be like dumping salt on a wound and can trigger off feelings of abandonment, betrayal, anger, confusion and loss that the client is now left to deal with on their own and some clients may not be able to process or deal with those emotions.

In the country that I live it is legal to discharge a client as long as two referrals are given to clients and we have no reporting agency here either. I am with you on having a reporting body about abrupt terminations or terminations that the therapist finds necessary. Perhaps the therapist is not aware of or unwilling to do their own work and deal with countertransference that may come up with some of their clients.

I am really sorry you are going through this.

Big safe warm hugs to you.

Hi Cheeza,
I know the ethical standard in the states if a T needs to let a client go (which they are obliged to do if they do not have the expertise to treat them or can not control their countertransference (good or bad)) is that they offer them at least one processing session (I have read a suggested rule of thumb which said that one session per every year of therapy is recommended) and they are obligated to offer referrals and make sure that you have access to the care you need. Ideally they should continue to work with you to transition to a new T. Not just drop you on your butt. I do not know if what your T did was illegal per se, but it was definitely unethical and I think should be reported to her professional body.

You also may want to look to see if she is rated anywhere online and add a review. That would probably have more impact on her bottom line.

I am sorry, I think she treated you terribly.


AG

Thank you I am in the process of responding to you and will post it tomorrow.

Chezza

(((CHEZZA)))

From the beginning, when you first started to post about your ex-therapist, she sounded off. I know that doesn't help much but some of these therapists are SO screwed up. And then someone genuine like you seeks help and is open and honest about your feelings and you get screwed over. It's just not right.

I'm so sorry how she ended things with you. It sounds inhumane. It astounds me coming from people in a healing profession but there are so many stories out there just like this.

My therapist told me today, though, that there is a big difference between a healer and someone who does, say, CBT. I thought it was an interesting distinction. If I was a therapist, I would want to be a healer. I bet you would be too.

Hi Chezza... I am speaking as someone from the U.S. The question is not if it's illegal or legal to dump a client and how you dump them. I was told and have seen from reading that here it is VERY difficult to win a malpractice case against a therapist. It's easier vs. a medical doctor. This is why malpractice insurance for T's is less expensive for them.

On the other hand, there is the question of whether the T's behavior is ethical and is violating the ethical guidelines of their governing/licensing body. In the U.S. licensed psychologists are under the State's authority and their professional board is the American Psychological Association (APA). When I did my research after being horribly abandoned and harshly terminated by my oldT, I found that the licensing boards use the guidelines of the APA (or whatever professional body is appropriate... there are others for clinical social workers and licensed mental health counselors).

The problem is in reading through the "termination" ethical guidelines... they are very ambiguous and I'm fairly sure that is for a reason to protect T's and not the patients. I ended up writing my B.S. thesis on Ethical vs non Ethical Terminations in Therapy. The APA guidelines say a T can terminate if the client's issues are outside their area of expertise, if the client does not pay them over a period of time, or if the client is not benefitting at all from therapy (must be documented) or if the client is threatening physical harm to T or his family.

I was doing none of those things. I had written communications from oldT saying how much I was "improving". I was paying. I was not threatening. As for practicing outside of his expertise... he was BUT an the big BUT is that he should have known before 2.5 years had gone by that this was an issue so severe that it deserved a harsh abandonment of the patient (me). My current T says he will know within 2 sessions or so whether the issues are outside of his area of practice.

I was given 15 minutes warning of the termination, I was handed a piece of paper with 3 T names (as referrals) none of them oldT even knew... he found their names on a Psychology Today website, and then he literally slammed the door in my face as I stood there sobbing and telling him I was being traumatized by not being able to talk to him about it.

His response to get rid of me was to call the police to take me away to the crisis center at the hospital and there I had to fight my way out of being committed by convincing the personnel there that I was not a threat to myself or anyone else that I was just grieving and in shock. My oldT was leaving for a 3 week vacation and he told me at the hospital that he would meet me for a session when he got back. The hospital let me go and the next evening I got an email from old T telling me all sessions were cancelled and I was officially terminated. It was a Friday night and I had no access to a P or T and no one around me even knew I was in therapy so I had no one except one friend and this board to turn to.

I ended up being diagnosed with PTSD caused by oldT's actions (on top of my already having C-PTSD). After interviewing and trying out 4 other T's I finally found my current T who was my savior. it took me TWO YEARS to even begin to do any therapy with him because of being so traumatized by oldT.

We threatened Board action against oldT and he finally turned over my notes and agreed to meet with us for a session of "closure" for me. My T was very supportive of me and was there for that session which occurred almost exactly one YEAR after I was abandoned. The meeting did not provide any answers to me about why he behaved as he did. He apparently seemed clueless as to the harm he caused me. He was more worried about some bad reviews someone (not me) wrote on the internet about him. It seems that others out there had bad experiences as well. He accused me of writing those reviews which was crazy because at that time I was still trying to find peace with him and to even see him for a time to transition me to another T. But that was all he cared about and to this day still refuses to believe I did not write the reviews. I almost wish I had thought of doing that, but it's not really my style.

Anyway, I ended up deciding not to take him in front of the Board. I am sure he would have at least been suspended or even lost his license to practice. He also violated our HIPAA laws on privacy and he did not have me sign an Informed Consent form. he would have been in deep doo doo. My current T was willing to testify on my behalf against him... which really meant a lot to me and believe me my current T would have been a formidable foe. In the end I decided not to go forward with it because I knew it would delay my healing and cause me further trauma and anguish. I also knew he had a child my son's age who I met a number of times and I didn't want to hurt him. At the closure session I read oldT a 14 page letter I wrote detailing all his screw ups and how they impacted me, how I suffered and was almost destroyed and that he owed me his career and livelihood because I could have had his license taken away. I told him he needed remedial classes on ethics and told him he should never see adult patients, especially females, ever again (he also did child therapy).

So that is my story. I wish you the best.

TN

Thanks BLT; I have contacted her professional body for their ethical guidelines for termination of psychotherapy by private practitioners and am waiting for them to get back to me. I would have respected her terminating my counseling had she done it in a humane/professional capacity, which is easy enough but she choose to be spiteful and of course she knew it which makes it worse. It makes a mockery of her being a so called trauma counsellor, considering she has practiced for approx. 18 years she’s also a clinical supervisor and should know better!

Thank you to ghost girl. Abrupt is an understatement; we were working quite well for at least the last 3 months until the last but one session. By email I requested for the first time in two years an extra session due to my being triggered badly by a comment she made about me dissociating, this was the first time I heard that term used about me and right on the last minutes of my session! In the email I asked her not to contact me until later in the day due to a heavy work load. However within 20 minutes of emailing her she called me saying me she didn’t have time to read my email and told me to read it to her, she was very cold towards me and kept insisting I saw my Dr because she was worried about me, even though I kept asking her why, she gave no reason! She also said she couldn’t see me in case I asked again as she doesn’t offer extra session, my response was okay, I respect your decision. She said she couldn’t work with me anymore, my immediate response was' are you ending my counseling she said “I didn’t say that”. She also said she didn’t know how to contain me between sessions! Her behaviour over the phone was out of character and I asked several times if it was her, she sort of sniggered and said yes. I also asked her if she thought I was suicidal but she wouldn’t answer, she didn’t really make any sense to me. When I saw her next and repeated some of the things she had said during that call she categorically denied it; that’s why I think she ended my counselling. I also told her that had I been suicidal she would have finished me off with that call without a doubt. As much as I struggled with her throughout the two years I did form an attachment with her. Her abrupt abandonment was excruciating. She promotes working with victims of trauma, that’s a bloody joke if ever there was one!

Thank you Chezza

(I am in the process of responding to
Attachment Girl, Liese & True North soon)

Thanks Attachment Girl, whenever different subjects came up with the C I always asked her if she was able to work with me on them including erotic transference, she always said yes so on that note I deemed it safe to trust and work with her. She did offer me another (final) session which I turned down in a letter saying unless a non-partial advocate at my discretion could be present which she declined in a two line letter; including a web site where I might like to find another counselor!
Whether what she did was illegal or not I have every intentions of reporting her, just in case she may already have a record against her!

Thanks to you I checked on line ratings and reviews, The C advertise on many sites. She really needs to acknowledge to herself that her behaviour was despicable and unacceptable and should never happen to anyone else she works with – that’s what is driving me to highlight her unprofessional practice.

Chezza

Dear Liese, you supported me so much in the first year of counseling and I am forever grateful to you for this. Ex-C was absolutely anal in her approach and so hung-up on ‘protecting her family’; I don’t know why she felt the need to tell me this several times considering I never asked her anything personal! In fact I stopped asking her anything because unless it was asked in the moment she wouldn’t answer me, even though it may take me several days to process things she had said! I felt like I wanted to pull the broom handle out of her arse much of the time! Both the ex-C and my T said I was more open in my approach them most clients so not sure if that’s a good or bad thing!

I agree with your therapist Liese, some people are healers, I believe the T I have now may be one of those, she is quite the opposite of ex- C and definitely authentic. I like to think I am authentic in my job (I’m a people worker).

Liese I always follow your posts, I am so pleased you became strong enough to move to new T’s who can meet your needs and take to you a higher level that will enable you to move forward in your life. I will remember this in my journey. Thank you.

Chezza

True North, I’m not ignoring your post, I will respond a.s.a.p.

Thanks for letting me know. I was getting a bit anxious about it. I hope you are doing okay.

TN

Dear True North, please forgive me for taking so long to respond to your post. This week has been a very busy one for me.

I have been reading your postings and am aware of your horrible abandoned and harsh termination by your oldT. I don’t know about you but I never considered ex-C doing what she did and for what I can only assume was a small disagreement over something she said. Ex-C came across quite passive which I didn’t take advantage of; she lacked a sense of humour and was hard to work with but I worked honestly and honorably with her. On saying that, on one occasion I remember her coming in the room and before she even sat down became quite defensive and told me to stop telling her what she was thinking (I apologized and from then on kept my mouth shut when she clearly showed a discomfort or blushed when I discussed personal things which made my shame mega-worse) that was probably the only time I saw her animated; until the phone call when she lost the plot!

BACP the governing body send me emails from a ’professionals’ stance, there is so much to read but it looks like it works the same as APA, what a joke and in some cases it could be a deadly joke for the poor unsuspecting client. I think this has to be reviewed and maybe pushed by the many dumped and concerned clients, even if only by a simple(ish) questionnaire posted on as many blog boards as possible to reflect the depth/nature and number of people being unethically dumped. We all have our stories and I would like to see them be told (any writers on the boards that may like to show the magnitude and major impact unethical therapists have on clients and their professions as a whole?). I would like to clarify I am not tarring all therapists with the same brush but it would be good for all to read and look at how unethical endings may be recorded/answerable to?

Wow you really did delve deep especially to the point where you did your B.S. thesis on Ethical vs non Ethical Terminations in Therapy, how interesting. As far as I know in my case there wasn’t any issues that were outside her area of expertise as I checked-in with her before proceeding, e.g. erotic transference, however what was actually going on for her I would never know! I was never late, turned up and paid every time I attended so that wouldn’t be an issue. As for whether I wasn’t benefitting from therapy, can be argued but it was discussed and we were working much better the latter three months. The only thing I did was request another session by email which she wasn’t happy about and told me if she let me have it that time that I would expect it again and that she didn’t do ‘crises’ work! I said “respect, I didn’t know that, I wouldn’t ask again”, but she totally denied saying this, the reason why I think this she dumped me, pathetic or what? I certainly never threatened her verbally or physical harmed her family whom I nothing about. I can only guess ex-C was writing things down but whether she read them before session I doubt as we rarely picked up on subjects the following week for the two years I was there!

It makes me see red when I hear about the work you put in with your oldT and unbeknown to you he was out of his league, it’s so dangerous, our vulnerability is super-heightened discussing things we barely acknowledge ourselves let alone voice them with all the shame, fear that comes with it.

I think both oldT and ex-C are Bully’s neither giving us a chance to discuss the issues, yet we were the ones turned away with our tails between our legs and made to feel bad; with head & hearts full of pain… gawd what spiteful, nasty people and gutless to say the least. Do you know what makes me sick is they both work at helping people THROUGH Trauma, what a sickening joke, the system stinks. I am truly sorry you, others and myself has had to endure such heartache and having f*****g paid for it, where’s the justice here!

Being committed by that tyrant is beyond belief, what a scary traumatic time; thankfully you still had some fight in you and didn’t lie down and give up as I can imagine many others would have.

I am so pleased you have found a T you can trust and eventually do therapy with. My new T is brilliant, professional and keeps me focused but unfortunately I am still traumatized by ex-C’s abrupt ending and in my word her shoddy work (just earning her money, she’s an ear not a heart person worker if you know what I mean)!

How interesting others were writing bad reviews about oldT; it sounds like others have also been wronged by this man! I knew trying to prove my counselor negligible would be hard as it’s her word against mine. On saying that I have many notes from my sessions that if a savvy IT person opened those up they’d see I haven’t doctored them which should hold-up my side of the story should I chose to take it further. So I did what Attachment Girl suggested I checked her online advertising sites and added a review as it would probably have more impact on her. All reviews are checked and I believe they contacted ex-C, as one she removed her information another is still on and the other two haven’t gone on yet! I guess the moral of the story is if you haven’t got anything good to say it doesn’t go on line! The reason I did this was purely to ensure she’ll think twice about doing it to another unsuspecting client/s and if this works for at least one would be worth it.

True North I am glad you had the opportunity to tell your oldT what your experience was like with him and the impact he had on your life. From all this you are by far the better person and I am so pleased you’ve moved on from him. You’re a strong woman, getting even stronger.

Thank you for sharing this with me

Chezza

Just a small recap of where I am at. Within two weeks of being dumped by ex-C I found a lovely T who from the start came across authentic and strangely uses my name which I like, it never happened with ex-C, she never once used my name! I did trust ex-C and am trying not to allow my experience with her impact my therapy now but it is hard. T contains me, I know she cares and even told me she liked me and working with me, simple eh… well at the moment, I am realistic there’ll be some bumpy roads along the journey.

Thank you for caring about me and all the best on your journeys.

Chezza

Hi Chezza... thank you for your very thoughtful reply to my post. I am happy to hear that you have found someone who understands you and even uses your name which I think is SO important to establishing that special connection.

I am glad you added your review to exC's advertisement. I felt very much like you in my wish to spare others what I have been through. It should never happen and yet it does, time and time again. It's the dirty secret of therapy in that no one talks about it and if they do, it's because the client was at fault. Beyone being incompetent, my oldT likely developed feelings towards me that scared him to death and instead of seeking supervision or us working through things, he abandoned me in the worst possible way. His actions caused me so much damage that I still deal with.

I think your exC was out of her depths and that scared her and so she found a way to eliminate the problem (you) so that she could once again feel good about herself. It really is very sad when this happens. And there is little if any literature or research on this out there.

Please let us know how you are doing. Thinking of you.

TN