Jdkk
Original Post
Hi Caeti nice to see you back here!
I’m sorry you’ve been in hospital - that sounds like things got really bad for you? I hope you’re feeling more able to cope with things now?
I’m not familiar with the positive feelings you’re talking about in relation to a T - maybe others on here who have similar experience are better able to relate to what you are explaining.
My immediate thought on your question about ‘coming clean’ with T and explain about a relationship of which he knew nothing is that that is exactly what you need to do! If for no other reason than it’s a HUGE chunk of important feelings and beliefs in you that you would have to hide otherwise, and how can therapy work if you have to consciously hide something as important as that (and which obviously was if not still is, affecting you profoundly). I don’t see it as something a T would refer you away for, but it would be important to tell him the true reasons for keeping it hidden and hopefully T would then work with those feelings for him within the therapy.
But either way it’s a risk because from what I’ve read on forum here some Ts can’t handle transference. I guess you are going to have to find out the hard way.
But my feeling is that not telling him doesn’t seem to me a very wise option. Not sure if that’s any help at all - just want to give you lots of support and sympathy for the predicament you’re in.
Lamplighter
I’m sorry you’ve been in hospital - that sounds like things got really bad for you? I hope you’re feeling more able to cope with things now?
I’m not familiar with the positive feelings you’re talking about in relation to a T - maybe others on here who have similar experience are better able to relate to what you are explaining.
My immediate thought on your question about ‘coming clean’ with T and explain about a relationship of which he knew nothing is that that is exactly what you need to do! If for no other reason than it’s a HUGE chunk of important feelings and beliefs in you that you would have to hide otherwise, and how can therapy work if you have to consciously hide something as important as that (and which obviously was if not still is, affecting you profoundly). I don’t see it as something a T would refer you away for, but it would be important to tell him the true reasons for keeping it hidden and hopefully T would then work with those feelings for him within the therapy.
But either way it’s a risk because from what I’ve read on forum here some Ts can’t handle transference. I guess you are going to have to find out the hard way.
But my feeling is that not telling him doesn’t seem to me a very wise option. Not sure if that’s any help at all - just want to give you lots of support and sympathy for the predicament you’re in.
Lamplighter