Hi Unbroken,
I had a "last" session with my T when I stopped going regularly (his door remains open and I have been back when I've felt the need). I wrote a pretty detailed account of it which you can read here: Completion Party for AG

Don't have much time right now as I am in the middle of pre-Christmas insanity, so I'll leave it at that. Let me know if you want to know more about anything.

AG

Thank you, AG! This was beautiful to read and it warmed my heart. I really hope that my final session with my T leaves me with good feelings, too. This isn't going to be easy because as much as I look forward to working with my new T and exploring my childhood trauma's and learning about attachment from her, I will greatly miss my oldT. I didn't want to leave her, and the pain of leaving and starting all over again makes me incredibly sad. Hopefully, what I have planned will leave a lasting memory for the both of us that we can hold onto. I especially know that I will never forget her and will always carry a part of her in my heart for the rest of my life.

I've written some poems to my T but NEVER gave them or shared them. I might give one to her. I don't know.

I really just want to leave and not feel like I lost the one person in the world who I felt knows me better than anyone else.

--Brokes

Thanks for sharing

(((Unbroken)))

I hope you have a beautiful last session and it gives you some closure. And I also wish you a wonderful future with your new T!

quote:

I really just want to leave and not feel like I lost the one person in the world who I felt knows me better than anyone else.

Unbroken,
I know it's hard to leave. My first T retired and it was a difficult transition. And even though it was my choice to stop going regularly to my present T, it was still difficult. It's completely understandable that this hurts. Doing the right thing often does.

But I also want to assure you that you will not lose your T. The work you've done with her is part of you now and you will carry her with you as you go to work with another T. You will not be starting over (I know it can feel like that). Rather you are continuing the journey but with a new companion for this part.

I think my best advice is to speak from your heart, and say what seems important to say.

AG

(((((UNBROKEN)))))

Will be thinking of you and hoping it turns out the way you want it to. You will always carry her in your heart.

xoxo

Liese

You know I will be thinking of you at the *exact* same time and sending you my strength. I have been through this. Talk from the heart and have a list of what you want to say. Your new T is a keeper so you have a safe place for your next stage in therapy. T was just a stepping stone in your journey.

The support here has been a tremendous factor in my transition between the two T's. It's not easy, as all of you could imagine, losing someone that has become such an integral part of your life. Of course, I am going to carry a part of her around in my heart forever. That thought does give me some peace.

I'm ready to actually get the session done and over with. I feel like it's being dragged out and the longer it goes on, the longer I feel worried, scared, and hesitant. I just want to go in there...tell her I love her and thank her and then walk out ready to move onto the next step.

T wont hug me on the last session. She never does...SO, I am trying to psych myself up for a non-physical hug that signifies the end of our relationship. A hug is the most meaningful expression to me, SO this makes it hard.

Thanks for all your thoughts. The day cannot get here SOON enough.

--Brokes

(((hugs))) Gosh Brokes, you're so brave. And I wish you all the best of luck with this. I don't have much to say but my support. xxxx

Hi Unbroken... you have probably followed my story and know how hard and painful it was to leave my oldT. What made it unnecessarily worse was that he handled it SO badly, thinking only of himself and what HE needed. He truly abandoned me and thankfully I found my new T who is a true miracle. I know it is scary to start again with a new T and I know it's a loss to leave your current T but you will be better off in the long run and you will heal. I know it seems impossible to develop that bond of attachment again but if the T is the right one it will happen again. I'm not saying it's possible with just anyone but if you have a T who understands attachment and is not afraid of it then she will nuture the attachment and it will grow. I am fortunate that my T is always nurturing my attachment to him and it has happened and I am slowly healing.

I will be thinking of you and praying all goes well.

Hugs
TN

((((((Unbrokes))))))

Brokes - see what True North wrote above. DITTO for me. Word for word.

Brokes - I did get a hug out of YoungT - but that is because she had acted so badly and caused HUGE grief and problems for me - it was the least she could do. I think it eased her conscience.

So your T isn't in that same boat, so yeah don't hold your breath on that one.

Your new T is lovely, kind, competent, experienced, caring, wise and every other nice word I can think of - she is there waiting for you after Christmas. She is yours and yours for as long as you need her. She will not terminate you, she will not get rid of you, she will not abandon you.

Hugs

(((Unbroken)))

Just remember you are NOT broken, actually in this moment you are stronger than you've ever been. You are really brave to do this and all of us are cheering for you!

Unbroken... sorry Im not much help tonight but I'm thinking of you and I hope you get everything you need from this last session. Take some comfort in knowing your T has handled this gracefully and has given you the opportunity for some closure.

You will move on to a T who is better qualified to provide you with what you need and you will heal. I expect you will spend some time working on the grief of this goodbye. You will need time in therapy to process it because it was a meaningful relationship.

I don't know how you say goodbye... I still struggle with it 16 months later. It still hurts and gets mixed up in my new therapy. I still miss my oldT... or the oldT that I knew before he went crazy on me.

One day at a time and one foot in front of the other. That's how I do it.

Sending hugs. You are brave and strong and you will do this and do it well. It will be okay.

TN

(((((((((((((((Brokes)))))))))))))))))

Thinking of you and wishing all good things to come of your session tomorrow. I hope it goes better than expected. We are here for you.



SG

(((Broken))) Thinking of you hon. xxxx