My T talked about this once; he's never nodded off on me, but I see him in the morning. He said that in the afternoon, if he's worn out, sometimes he gets pretty sleepy and he's had a few different reactions. Some patients just up and fire him on the spot. Some pretend they don't notice. Others ask if he's ok. He said he really appreciates it when his patients ask him about it. It gives him a little jolt to get back with it.

I love my job, but I have times I just can't keep my eyes open, no matter how interesting what I'm working on is. Don't get me started on listening to teachers after lunch when I was in school ...

Talk to him about it. Don't think it's you, because it probably isn't. He probably didn't get enough sleep, or he's not feeling well or he had a big lunch or something. If he does that regularly, then that's different.

thanks for the feedback, there is a part of me that just doesn't want to bring it up and just hope it doesn't happen again. Another part of me wants to bring it up but is so afraid of his reaction. I'm afraid that it will embarress him and it will be awkward and weird, but I am somewhat wanting there to be a logical explanation. I know that many of you have been brave enough to confront or bring up conversations with your t's directly related to your feelings towards them, I have not. I am not feeling transference I don't think, but to date, there really hasn't been any conflict in our therapy relationship. Maybe it is ok just not to say anything and chalk it up to a rough day for him?!?!?

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Maybe it is ok just not to say anything and chalk it up to a rough day for him?!?!?

I think that if it's bothering you (which it certainly seems to be) that talking about it may allow you to put it to rest.

If you feel like you can actually let it go (and not just bury it somewhere) then I think that's ok too.

Hi Hals,
Welcome to the forum! I totally understand why you're so uncomfortable about this, it would bother me if my T nodded off, but I must agree that I know sometimes in the afternoon I can get hit with an uncontrollable need to nod off that has NOTHING to do with what I'm doing.

I've had two really excellent therapists and with both of them I have experienced what I think of as the "head snap." I'm looking away and talking (and trust me, I can seriously drone on sometimes ) and when I look back at them, there's that split second of seeing their eyes glazed over and then they snap back around and focus back on me. To be honest, it always bothers me just a little, but the truth is that they're human and no matter how much we like, enjoy and care about someone, our attention can occasionally drift. Its never happened often enough, or for a prolonged enough length of time for me to bring it up.

So I think it's fine if you don't want to bring it up, especially if it's a one time thing. The real yardstick for speaking up is if it continues to bother you, especially if you feel like its interfering with your ability to open up to your T. And I know it's scary to anticipate getting a bad reaction but one of the things a therapist has to do is be non-defensive with a client. If something is bothering you, even if its about his behavior, it's fair game and he'll be able to hear you out without making it about him.

AG

Thanks again for the feedback...I've decided to "not sweat the small stuff" and let this go. I suppose if I can let it go, that will be just another little sign of progress in my therapy.

Hi Hals and welcome.

Since you've decided to "let it go" I won't go on too much.

All I can do is give this situation my two cents...and if it were me in your position I think I would be seriously upset. While I know i shouldn't take it personally I know i would. And chances are, like the others have said, T's are just human too, they get tired and have a very demanding job which probably takes a lot out of them. I can relate, particularly at the moment, to being totally wrecked most of the time so I think it's good to keep that in mind.

That said, again I am so happy to be able to say that my ex-T always gave me the impression he was totally "with" me. I was very lucky.

I'm just thinking, that we all here are seeing therapist because there are things that we coulnd't let go even if trying really really hard to bury them and move on.

Hal, my T once said something a bit stupid let's say. I didn't feel good about it and decided to let it go.
Sometime later I was ready to tell him about it, and he agreed that it was not right, insensitive and apologized. His reaction to me saying this made me feel so much closer to him and somehow happy.

Hello Hal, and welcome.
I had a similar experience with my T being insensitive about something. (thought I had let it go) Then a few more small things happened; I let those go too. These little things began to erode the relationship, and he picked up on it. With rejection being my huge weakness, I was afraid to be honest. When we finally talked, and I was able to share all of it, he sincerely apologized, and our relationship became stronger- much stronger.
This may not be your situation at all, but just be honest with yourself- can you really let it go? If so- great, but if not, save yourself the pain- and discuss it with him. He is human and he will make mistakes,; he knows that too.
My Best on your journey,
Helle