Hi Lonely ... I'm sorry you are suffering so much but if you take a few steps at a time you can really be helped. I have a very good friend who also had crippling social anxiety. She suffered for years with it and then finally found a doctor who put her on Paxil anti-depressant and she is doing so much better she can't believe it. Now I'm not saying this will solve everything for you and you would need to talk to a qualified doctor but there is help and hope out there.

I do think therapy would be beneficial to you also and there is no shame in it. So many people are in therapy and are helped by it. You don't need to tell your family. You may or may not want to tell your husband. I don't know if you have resources to pay for it yourself. I have not told my husband because I feel that this is for me at least now and I don't want him to try to talk me out of going.

Take a small step by looking up T's in your area in the phone book. Or you can use the Psychology Today website and type in your zipcode and they will provide a list of Ts in your area. Call a few and talk to them and get a feel for who seems like a match for you. Most Ts will give you 10 minutes on the phone to interview them. You don't have to make a decision immediately. Think about who made you feel comfortable and then you can make an appointment.

I think by breaking the process down into smaller manageable steps helps to take that first step.

Please don't think you are an annoying drama girl... the problem is that our families made us feel this way and that was wrong. Keep posting here because we all understand how you feel and we are willing to listen.

TN