Here's the deal....my ex and I have two children together, so we have deal with each other in some way. In my county we were required to go to parenting mediation during our divorce process. We decided on several things about our children's lives and how we were going to split up the time. I have the children the majority of the placement time. There are also legal issues such as where they go to school and whether or not they get piercings, tattoos and those types of decisions. The legal issues are somewhat separate from the time/placement schedule. There seem to be loopholes in the time/placement area.
Anyway....
my ex is an abusive person and likes to try and control every aspect of my life, but sees it as the world revolves around him and everything must go his way. If someone doesn't give into him, he throws a fit. During our marriage it was easier for me to give in to him, so I didn't have to hear or deal with a tantrum. BTW-not how I'm parenting my kids.
So, now that ex and I are divorced he wants something and asks over and over and over for it via e-mail and phone calls until I'm about to go nuts! If I say no he just continues the harassment and files court papers saying that I'm not cooperating. We just went back to court under false pretenses in May and had to redo our mediation agreement again this summer. That was just signed by the judge and mailed to me a few weeks ago. Guess what ex wants to do again???
Basically, he thinks our daughter needs to join an activity that he is already signing her up for on my placement time with her. He asked my opinion on this a month ago and I responded that at this time I didn't think it was a good idea due to her being in another activity (I gave in in the last mediation session on that one). This particular activity is risky and requires a huge time commitment. She's only 8! She does want to do it in a way because her dad talked her into it.
I don't know how to navigate this situation!
Anyone have life experience with this or suggestions???
This one lady that I know gave me her opinion last week. She basically told me that I'll probably end up thanking ex some day for all the life experience/lessons that he is teaching me because I'm going to need all of this information and experience to be a great T. She spun it as I should just use this as another learning experience that will make me stronger and better down the road.
I see what she is saying. For some reason it is hard to wrap my brain around when I'm angry at ex and trying to figure out my next move.
My first attorney saw this in my ex right away. She saw that ex and his attorney were trying to change our divorce agreement right after we had agreed (as we were waiting for the judge). My attorney got upset. After the hearing my attorney told me that I should look for someone cheaper for the next time (basically...I will be back several times with this type of person and I won't be able to afford her).
Ok...I have to get back to T training homework, which by the way is completely fascinating!!
