My T of several years is out of town for a few weeks. She has me seeing my nutrition counselor for extra sessions while T is out of town, for additional support.

Additionally, T contacted a local therapist who specializes in some type of body work for trauma, something called somatic experiencing. T wants me to have all the support I can get while she is gone, and also thinks that this additional type of trauma body work would be good for me to continue doing along side my work with her when she returns from her trip. So, I went to this new T today for an initial free consultation. I asked a lot of questions about what somatic experience work looks like, how is it different from CBT of psychoanalytic work, etc. We did a brief exercise so that he could demonstrate what it was about.

I agreed to set up another appointment with him next week. As I was leaving he asked me if I would be open to doing some homework between now and next session. I said yes, I love homework. He said he needed a few minutes to think of an assignment for me and said he would email me with the assignment later today.

He never did email me the assignment and I find myself totally irritated by this. I know he wasn't super busy today because when I booked the appointment for today a couple of days ago, he had the entire afternoon open with availability.

So now I am in this state of feeling forgotten about, irritated, questioning his competency, etc. and I am considering canceling the appointment next week.

Also, (and maybe this is just me being overly critical) he works out of his home and I had to walk past his kitchen to get to his treatment room. I found myself stopping in my tracks as I saw his messy kitchen. It was appalling. There were dirty dishes and food all over the kitchen counter and this bothered me. I know I shouldn't be judging him for this, yet I can't seem to separate this from his work as a therapist.

I also felt a little bit irritated during the session because he has a cat (and I love cats) and the cat came over and crawled into my lap which was not a problem at all because I do love cats and I actually found it quite comforting. The issue I had with it is that he (The messy therapist) kept interrupting to me to state that he couldn't believe his cat was taking to me so quickly and he went on about how his cat NEVER sits in clients laps and he just couldn't believe that the cat was sitting in my lap. The first time he commented about it, I was like, "Yeah, cats like me. Its totally fine with me, don't worry." but by the second and third time he interrupted me to talk about his cat sitting in my lap, I was like , "WTF new T with messy kitchen, can we just talk about me for a minute without you interupting me?"

Despite these annoyances and despite him not sending the homework like he said he would, I did find myself intrigued by the brief exercise he did with me and I am desperate for help with my PTSD, and I am really torn because that part of me wants to go back and continue to work with him alongside my work with my regular T when she returns, and my nutritionist. (Yeah, i am like knee-deep in therapy). But I find myself also really put off by his lack of follow through on the homework and his messy kitchen.

I suppose I should at least give it another go, or perhaps look for another T who does his type of work. The problem is that there are not many Ts who are willing to work with me while I also work with my regular T, so I feel my choices are limited.

I also don't want my regular T to think I was disrespectful/unappreciative of the effort she went to to find this man for me who would be willing to work with me while she is out of town and even when she gets back if I wish to continue with him. I don't want to seem "resistant" or dismissive of this trauma work that she has recommended I do in addition to my work with her. But I am really feeling unimpressed by this T I went to today.

What would you do?