I don't exactly do a session by phone, but my T calls me each weekend and we chat - sometimes for 10 mins and sometimes for an hour.

What I have found is that it has been very powerful and I tend to cry more with T on the phone. This has helped me unlock a few issues i have about crying and shame. I tend to speak differently with T by phone.

The downside is that i usually get called in between weekend activities with T and at times she has been very distracted and it has annoyed me. Angered me. Severely. When she is in a quiet place and pays the attention then they have been powerful to do phone calls.

This fortnight I have been severely shut down and this week angry at T. Maybe a phone call might have helped as having her not physically near me would have been positive?

It is a strange thing - i think it is individual. If you can't have face to face, then phone is good, great even - it isn't the same though. For me it has helped as an adjunct and just one of the many, many things that T and I do to help unlock me.

Somedays

hi cat!
i have had 2 phone sessions recently with my T as i've been sick/ recovering and was unable to go in person. my T offered the sessions and they were during my 'normal' time, so she was there for the whole 50min as usual. i have to say i was really stressed about this as i usually hate talking on the phone (my phone calls to her in the past have only been in crisis and pretty short). so the first time i called for my phone session i was 15min late because i sat there trying to get the courage up and wondering what i was going to say, i also wasnt sure if it was meant to be a session or only a check in type of call. anyway, my T said she had been waiting and confirmed that she was there for the full 50min. after i told her that i'm finding it hard, and the silences are even more awkward etc, she seemed kinder on the phone and it got a bit better. in fact, weirdly, i was able to talk more than i normally do in session. i think knowing that it is hard on the phone and you cant see each other, she was a bit more reassuring then she normally is. also, maybe i felt more free to talk because i wasnt sitting there sneaking a look at her after every sentence trying to figure out how she's reacting. my second phone session i was crying for most of it - and crying in session has only happened twice (in 2years!).

so all in all, unexpectedly, i found the phone sessions pretty good. its not the same as being there, but they had some advantages and it was sooo much better being able to have a 'session' when i was sick and couldnt go in person. in terms of 'closeness', i actually found it pretty 'intimate' talking to someone on the phone for almost an hour!

its probably an individual thing, and it might go either way depending on how you feel about it, how you're feeling at the time, how good your T is on the phone etc... i really hope it goes ok for you too! good luck!

puppet

Hey Catalyst,

I actually enjoy my phone sessions, but then, I was one of those preteens that spent hours everyday jabbering on the phone with my friends, so it's a mode of communication I'm pretty comfortable with.

I think in a way phone conversations can be more intimate than talking with someone in person, because their voice is right there in your ear, speaking directly into your brain, as it were. And without all the non-verbal cues, the nuances of the voice are more weighted with meaning and noticeable-- it calls for a different kind of attention. Think how it would be to have a conversation with somebody if you were blind, maybe.

That said, I think it's probably easier if you know them in person first, because that familiarity is there-- it's not a disembodied anonymous voice coming at you like when you talk to a stranger.

I usually go in to see T at her office, but I've had a number of phone sessions too. There have been times I was ill for extended periods, or recovering from childbirth, or just unable to get a babysitter. When that happens I usually will have a phone session during their nap time.

I like to closet myself in my room when I'm doing therapy over the phone. That way I'm in a familiar, comfortable environment. I can focus and "go inward" for the duration of the conversation without distractions. Sometimes (often, actually) I absentmindedly doodle in my art journal while on the phone with T. I'm not at all artistic, really, but I find art therapy interesting and have read up on it and tried some exercises. . . anyway, so I'll often be doing that while we talk-- I find it helps regulate anxiety (which the phone can tend to kick up in a way) and unlock access to my emotions, at least a little.

Then there are the times T says she's going to call and doesn't. . . but that's a matter for another thread.

HTH, good luck!