*may trigger*

I recently started a new job which at the time I didn't realise would be in a envornment consisting of angry troubled men who for one reason or another have trouble with boundaries and are abusive.i have to stay over on night shifts with these men who can call or text and you go to their flat if they need you. I have a history of trauma and the nights are terrifying the whole job is awful the other day one of the men decided he was going going to watch porn whist i was there i have been told by managment that what they decide to do in their homes is their right and not alot we can do about it,i have to spend 5 or 6 hours at a time with these people.
T has been texting me before I start and the next day to see if I'm ok when I do night shifts she said its not healthy and traumatic.
I don't want to go back but can't help feeling like I've failed I'm still living with my parents who when I said I didn't like it told me I hadn't given it enough time they wouldn't have me here if I couldn't pay my way.i am still welcome at my old job but just too stubborn and embarrassed to say I've got it wrong i was substance free for months before i started this job,any ideas would be appreciated I just don't feel I've got the energy for another upheaval.thanks for reading