Hey loorie,
Absolutely you should continue therapy. Transference is commom, and the fact that you have a T that is willing to work through it with you is a plus, not all are willing to do that. My T said that since I could not depend on my parents, I developed a pseudo independence - whereby I would not allow anyone in and I acted like I needed no one. He said that I needed to learn a healthy dependence for a while. A side complication to that sometimes is transference. My T was attempting to provide for my needs in a way that my parents could not. This led to all sorts of confusion for me, but now things are beginning to make sense. I am learning that this is just part of the process - the way things needed to be for me. I never learned to be dependent on anyone before, and this was sooo hard to do.
Definitely stick with it, and keep posting. This site offers loads of support. the people are wonderful and very knowledgable.
I have not been in therapy very long- about the same as you, but others have much more wisdom. Stay with it and with us.
I wish you all the best on your journey.

hi again, thanks helle, i feel a little bit relieved, but i dont know this feeling of dependence i feel i need her beside me each and every hour, i know i need to deal with that. this deep attachement wont let go, im gonna see her this wednesday i guess i have to focus and cocentrate on the session this time. ive never had this bonding which i longed for with my parents along with 5 years being bullied continuously at school and sexual confusion was tough for me.im really thankful for having the chance to express my self. thanks

sorry i mean the bonding i have with her i dont have with my parents i dunno if i got it right sorry im not a native speaker thats why

Loorie... I also voted that you should stay in therapy ... especially as helle said...you have a T that is willing to work this through with you and most of them do not react that way. You also need to understand that this is VERY common in therapy, especially for those of us who did not have secure attachments with our parents. What you need to to learn what a healthy attachment is all about and that includes some dependency. That is really the first step in therapy. You need to be able to feel safe and that you can depend on your T before you can really do the work of therapy. To be able to confide your deepest fears, secrets, and issues you need to know the bond will withstand what you have to say.

Keep talking to your T about your feelings and keep posting here. I would also suggest you go back to some of our old threads on attachment and transference because there is a lot of good information on those threads. I hope it helps you. Let us know what you decide.

Be well,
TN

Hi loorie, welcome to the forum! I have to agree with what the others have posted so far. I also have struggled (still am, I guess) with the maternal transference. My experience is like helle's description, where I am fighting against an overwhelming urge to be dependent when I was used to being "pseudo-independent" for so long. This transference has happened earlier for me than you, though, as I have only been in therapy for abt 8 months. My T told me in our last session that I have an attach-avoid, attach-avoid style where I want attachment but can only go so far before running the other way in fear, and that I will continue to repeat this cycle she calls the "Come here, Go away Dance" until one day I can completely trust her. It feels like crap going through this - so internally chaotic - and I am not on the other side yet, but I still voted "Yes" that you should continue therapy because I am exercising this faith for myself as well.

Loorie,

I voted for you to stay with therapy. I'm a guy, and I guess transference is different with guys, but I have my own version of transference with my T. What you're experiencing sounds like such a real, authentic feeling, and maybe it's the beginning of real, true healing...a kind of repairing of what got broken earlier in life.

So I say stick with it!

Russ