Echo...step...away...from...the...delete...button...

I wanted to respond to your last post...but maybe you would rather I not do that, because it just disappeared. At any rate, I just wanted to say I've been thinking about you and wondering how it's going, whether you've made a decision. Having the one T know about your former P could be helpful or not, I guess it depends on how you see it. Please let us know how it's going. I hope you are doing okay!

Hugs,
SG

quote:

Originally posted by Strummergirl:
Echo...step...away...from...the...delete...button...

I wanted to respond to your last post...but maybe you would rather I not do that, because it just disappeared. At any rate, I just wanted to say I've been thinking about you and wondering how it's going, whether you've made a decision. Having the one T know about your former P could be helpful or not, I guess it depends on how you see it. Please let us know how it's going. I hope you are doing okay!

Hugs,
SG

Oops. Guess I'm not as sneaky and invisible as I thought...
I have a second appointment with T #2 tomorrow. I had my 1st appt with her last Thursday. I sat on her couch, said three sentences, and burst into tears. I never do that! Seriously, I was in therapy with ex-P for 14 months and never cried once. I liked her a lot. She feels very safe and "there" mentally. The other T was nice and seemed to get it, but she also interrupted me several times and didn't let me finish speaking. That's a problem, since I'm reticent to speak anyway. If someone starts cutting me off, I just shut down. T #2 didn't interrupt me at all. So I think she'll be the one I stick with.

Now the problem of childcare. I've been juggling asking different friends to watch the kids for an hour, hoping they don't communicate with each other about this. But the friend watching them tomorrow asked me, "So... all these 'doctor appointments'. Are you sure you're not really just getting manicures and spa treatments??" (If you ever met me you'd understand how funny this is - I'm a gardener and have perpetual farmer hands.) She was just making a joke, but still, the "favors" are going to run out soon. (I replied that No, I'm actually having an affair with my 25-year-old pool boy. No, we don't have a pool. )

Oh, about the T knowing who ex-P is... the other T knows him, too. But I'm being super secretive and refused to give ANY identifying information on him.

Hey Echo!

Based on what you said, my vote would be for T#2 too, for exactly the same reasons you described. Good luck tomorrow! I hope it goes well for you with her, again. Please let us know how it goes.

As for the childcare...I understand that privacy is important, and you probably don't want most people to know you're in therapy, but I very much wish there was one person you could confide in so they could help you out. You've said before that you live in a small town, so I would imagine that other options for more "anonymous" childcare are pretty limited or non-existant. You say your are worried about your friends figuring it out...but wouldn't that motivate them to help you out even more? That's probably a naive question...but I just hate to see you carrying this burden alone without any help. Maybe this great new T will have some suggestions for you.

Thanks for the update, Echo! Good luck tomorrow!

SG

I have told two friends. One helps me out and the other refuses even though I offered to reciprocate ("it's just too complicated; I'd have to get dressed"). It's weird though, yk? I think they think I must be really crazy. If I mention anything about marriage problems, people seem to disappear into thin air, as if that problem is contagious.