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4 replies

So that's it

elsewhererevisitedelsewhererevisitedMember
It's been 5 months since my T unexpectedly broke off contact due to a complicated pregnancy.
I was very hesitant at first trying to find another T, and tried to do without (with just a P who describes my pills). After a while I found out I wasn't coping and have done everything to get help from an interim. Nothing worked. Two weeks ago was my last effort. My P would once again try and find someone . Today the answer was: there is no one available. It's not that he doesn't agree I need one or am entitled to one - there IS no one. I can continue seeing him, but he just hasn't the communications skills that I need right now. And unwillingly hurts me more than he knows, can hardly blame him, it is not his profession. I think he agrees with that, but offers himself as being 'better than nothing'...
My T is away for another 5 months. She has given birth to her son and they are fine. She never once asked about me. Today I sent her a present for her son (The Velveteen Rabbit - she and I both have rabbits) + a letter about me, in which I wrote down all of my feelings about what has happenend. The ugly, the bad and the good. I put it in a separate envelop and marked it 'this is workstuff, contains a letter from a client to her therapist; Only read when up to it.'
She was the one urging me to change my lifelong habit of doing everything on my own. And to ask for help after she'd gone.
I wish I'd never listened to her.
I am really done.
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I incognitoMember
Elsewhere

I can only imagine how awful you feel that you haven't been able to find a replacement T and that T appears to have gotten through her health scare and delivered a healthy baby but hasn't asked about you. I do want you to remember that you don't actually know for sure she hasn't asked about you or more importantly thought of you just that you haven't been told about it. I am glad you wrote her how you felt and I think it was appropriate that you marked it as work related which gives her notice about what it contains.

I am sorry that she is gone and I can understand why you feel done. I keep reminding myself that I can be done with therapy or my therapist but I'm not done with myself or my own life.

thinking of you
skylynxskylynxMember
Elsewhere, I hope so much your old T does at least reply to your gift and letter. I understand a baby can make a woman unusual for awhile, and maybe she just needs some more time, tho it's already seemed like too much for you. BTW I read the Velveteen Rabbit and it's so precious a story with lots of meaning, and surely one of my favorites. I know the book will be cherished, whether it's said, or not.
evaevaMember
Frowner

Elsewhere I am so so so sorry for the pain you are feeling. I can't even begin to imagine the pain you are going through Frowner. It's one of my huge yet unspoken about fears if mine that my T will get pregnant and go on maternity leave. Because if my issues with 'motherhood' for me it would feel a worse betrayal than if she just terminated me.

I don't knw where you live or what system you're in - I'm assuming it's a public system? Is there ANY chance you can go privately to see a T? Even if you could afford to go once a fortnight, would it be better than no one??

Sending you lots of ((((hugs))) and I really hope y get some reply from your old T too

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