Hey that confused thing in the title was code for a sad face! It looks like I am saying I am confused. lol

This was supposed to be the face in the title. Guess it doesn't work like that.

Hi Jo,

Sorry to hear that you didn't have luck with the first T that you met. Was she maybe a recent grad to feel like your issues would be too much for her to handle?

The one you are going to meet tomorrow sounds like she has a bit more of an understanding. I hope that it works out for you

Holly

Hey Jo,

I hope the next new therapist works out for you. If not, keep looking. Don't spend too much time and money on someone that doesn't work for you.

She's (or he's) out there somewhere, and you'll find her (or him).

BTW, I've liked the name Jo ever since that one TV show, I can't remember the name, about the girls who were in a boarding school and one of them was named Jo (The cool nurse from ER with the dark hair played that character). Do you remember the name of it? I wanted my name to be Jo. Heck, I wanted to be Jo. She was cool.

catgirl

George Clooney was in it, I think. Does anyone remember?

Hi Catgirl
I think the show was The Facts of Life

MP

Which one was Jo on Facts of Life? Was she the butch one?

She had the long, dark hair, had a motorcycle, was always fighting with the blonde one (Blair). Wow, I know far too much about this

I never liked that show facts of life My sister's name is jo.

Anyway thanks for the support. It sucks going through all that I am going through right now without an established T.

Dad is dying, Mom is sick, I lost my best friend, lost my T because she retired, lost my job but got it back now. Recently found out that I was severely abused as a child. Siblings all talk about it as if I knew about it. I guess I ahd no choice but to hear it now. Abuse was so bad we had broken bones and concusions from it but I can not recall any of it. But all of my siblings discuss it even if they don't all react the same. Some think it was nothing some know it was detremental etc but no one says it didn't happen. At first when I found out I shook for 2 months straight, day and night. Thank God that is over. It's only been a little over a year that I have been awware of this and I have no T to talk to. I know I am whining but I can't help it.

Hi jo,

You aren't whining at all, please talk as much as you need to. There's a lot of stuff going on in your life and if we can help you deal with that even a tiny bit until you find a T, then that's what we're here for.

Realising your childhood wasn't what you thought it was is terrible, it shakes you right down to the core. I'm glad the initial shock is wearing off, and that you can start tackling this in therapy. I still remember the first time i realised what went on when i was a kid. I was sitting at the bus stop at school on my own when i was about 15. Then this memory popped into my head of my mother repeatedly punching me in the stomach, winding me. I was crying. Dad asked her why she was doing it. She said "because I feel like it". I was about 4. That's my earliest memory of my life. And it's only been the past couple of years that I realised NOT all families were like that. You aren't supposed to be scared of your parents. Which sounds stupid unless you're in one of those families.

I am the oldest child in my family, I have no idea what my brother or sister remember, and I am not close to either of them so I would not really discuss it with them. Not unless they ever asked me about it anyway.

You can get through this and we will help anyway we can. Fingers crossed the second T was right for you...

LTF

Hi Jo,
I hope that the therapist you see today continues what started on the phone and you find a good match. Good choice moving on from the therapist who said you were too much to handle; she's already blaming you and you haven't even started working with her yet. She may have chosen the wrong field.

And you are NOT whining. You are dealing with an amazing amount of stuff and just need support. Anyone would that was dealing with what you're dealing with. And I understand how you feel about remembering. I didn't remember the sexual abuse at all until I remembered in my early 30s while working on my "known" issues in therapy. It's confusing and disorienting, not to mention painful, to remember this stuff. You wouldn't have forgotten it in the first place if it hadn't been really bad. But you really can heal and you'll find the right therapist. Let us know how today goes, I'll be thinking of you.

AG

Thank you LTF and SG!

It is nice to know you are rooting for me.

I really hope this goes well today. As much as I try to dismiss the stress of seeing a new T but the truth is it can be disheartening to have it not work out. Sounds like both of you have had to deal with horrific childhoods yourselves. My heart goes out to you.

Jo

{{{Jo}}},

Let us know how things work out with the T you are seeing today. I wouldn't consider you whining, it's apparent that you need to vent and talk about some of the things that are going on with you. You are going through an awful lot in your current life, and on top of the things you are learning from your past, you must be feeling overwhelmed.

I can identify with you in a few of your situations (death, illness, abuse, job loss) and I know how hard it is to try and keep yourself together without the help of a P/T, and a good support network (such as this forum, friends and family).

I'll be thinking about you today

Holly

(((holly)))

Well I met with the New, new new T and she wsa okay. I didn't feel an immediate connection or anything but perhaps that is good. I think she is probably a good T. Seems to catch on quickly to the things I was telling her. Unfortunately I can not see her again until May 22 because she is traveling to Italy etc for the next two weeks. Sort of hard since I am facing my dad's death and all but she is probably worth the wait. She thought that my last T's BS about how I am to smell etc was totally inappropriate and mean. When I told her about it she slapped her forehead and shook her head in dismay. It was nice to get that support. I cried because I realized that it really did hurt me what the last T did.

Hey Jo,

I can't imagine that the comments the last T made to you would NOT have hurt you, and that you didn't recognize the pain earlier. I was really disgusted when you told us about what she said to you.

It's awesome that this T recognized how inappropriate/unsupportive the other one was being. Even though there wasn't an immediate connection between you, it sounds like she is going to be a good support for you. It's to bad that she will be away when you need someone now. The only nice thing about her going away now is that she likely won't be on another holiday for awhile so you won't have to go through any T withdrawl symptoms any time soon (once you develop a connection)!

Over the next few weeks that she's gone, we'll all be here for you, some of us have directly experienced the things you are dealing with regarding your father so feel free to lean on us

Take care

Holly

Jo,
I like the sound of this new T and especially that she is validating you which you richly deserve. I think the last was a nutjob, if you'll pardon the term.

I'm sorry about your father, it's so difficult to lose a parent. And I'll agree with Hollybaby (smart woman that!) and invite you to lean on us as much as you need to.

AG

Hi Jo... I know you have a lot to deal with while your new T is away but you can come here and talk and we will support you. I sort of know how you feel. My Dad passed away 5 years ago now after being ill for a year and then mom, who was having memory issues got much worse and was diagnosed with Alzheimers. That went on for 4 years and she passed on last January. Thank goodness I found my T two months before she died. He helped me so much and just having a place and someone to run to when things felt out of control was an enormous relief to me.

So until your T gets back from Italy we are here to support you.

TN

THANK YOU!

Your reassurances of being here during this difficult time is a relief!

I so appreciate all of you.

I will try to check in here every day and comment.

Thanks for being here for me.