I had a session with the Therapist yesterday and he said something to me and again, I thought he was being mean. He said he wasn't. As soon as I hear someone being mean to me or it registers as being mean, I no longer hear anything they are saying. I can't keep going back, constantly telling him he is being mean to me. I have told him it is very important for me to like him (I am sure this is not a priority of his) because I have to like him in order to let him into my personal thoughts and feelings.

I feel this is a hurdle I am not going to be able to get past. I am so discouraged and feel no matter what he does, what he says, he is being mean to me on purpose and wants me to leave.

I would have talked to him about it yesterday but as soon as I feel someone is being mean, I can not speak about it because I start to cry. It's horrible.

I think if it had to do with someone else being mean to me, I could talk to him about it. Because this has to do with him, I struggle with talking to him regarding things that have to do with him.

I think something deep has been struck because when he comes to mind I think I never, ever, ever want to see him ever, ever again.

This is not fair to him. He has told me before he is not being mean but the feelings, they are so strong and so real. What do I do with these feelings?

T.