I found it very successful when I did DBT for almost a year (as part of ED recovery). I did find it insulting and stupid at times, but at the end of it I did find a change, and connecting to others and hearing their experiences and learning how they dealt and used their "skills" (the whole GROUPNESS of it) was a treasure in my healing.

For some it works, for others it doesn't.

I appreciate your reply Catalyst. That gives me some hope. My T says that it can be modified to fit me. That it isn't just a cookie cutter sort of thing. Did you find that to be true for you? This T is crazy about DBT. I mean she constantly talks about it. I can see where the middle eastern philosphy could be helpful. Core mindfulness etc. Some of the acronyms are off putting though. DEAR MAN. Yuck. But none the less your response does help me. I don't want to be so defensive about it as I think I have to do it no matter what.

The acronyms are obnoxious... but here is the deal, it's just a learning tool. I can tell you I don't think of those acronyms... ever except as bad memories of corny stuff from DBT group. But, what I did find helpful was learning how to communicate more effectively in some areas. For my stuff it was cookie cutter in group sort of... but everyone had their own stuff so we'd talk about their stuff and how it applied to them personally. Then when I'd do DBT individually with my T I only wanted to work on mindfulness so I could regulate my anxiety and that's what we did.

It's okay to be defensive, it's new... it's a *group*. I had to do processing group and DBT at my recovery place... the first day I walked in to group I looked around (at all the women...) and thought... F NO. It took a bit to grow on me and for the "seriously?" tape to stop playing. I learned a lot about myself and how to be more aware, learned a lot about how to take better care of me and my relationships, learned from others (like I said). But it wasn't without a lot of eye rolling. It wasn't indoctrinating and I didn't meet anyone in group who like... went home and studied the acronyms. It's okay to be defensive... I'm sorry you feel like you kind of don't have a choice in the matter... whenever I feel that way I will go EXTREME to the other side. So if someone says I can't have icecream I'll say to myself... oh yea? Well I'll invent an icecream making machine and learn how to make ice-cream on my own. Ya know?

OK, disclaimer, I haven't ever actually done a DBT group or therapy, but I friend once told me I should look into it. I started looking at the DBT self help website (http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/) and other resources to find out about it. At first it made me super mad and I did find it kind of condescending. I think I was mad because a lot of the skills were things I had learned to do from experience, and I wished someone had handed me the workbook at like, age 12 because it would have saved me so much suffering! But anyway I got over it and realized there is a lot of good stuff in there! I like that there are a TON of skills and you can pick and choose what works for you. So I hope you'll at least give it a try for a while and see how it goes.

Thanks you guys. You make it seem more do-able. I was in it briefly before but didn't have a therapist that supported it. This time I will have a therapist who supports it. I just don't want to spend most of my therapy time talking about skills if you know what I mean. And yes I am just like you catalyst in that I would make an ice cream machine too!