Yeah, I would ignore it as well.

thanks for all the imput!
I am not going to acknowledge it, although I will - as I always do - ask her if she has any plans for the weekend (our appointments are usually on Friday afternoon), so I'll just see what she says and go from there.
Actually, I feel quite relieved at the idea of not having to mention it

Permafrost, I am sure she would not acknowledge mine.

quote:

but it was a bit weird because it's so unnatural not to say something.

That's what bugs me most about therapy, actually. About 300 times per session I find myself thinking 'if this had been normal social interaction I would say...' or 'why can't she just respond like any other human being' or 'is it really that impossible to see me as a person rather than a patient'.

quote:

Originally posted by LadyGrey:
My T2 didn't even wish me a merry xmas or ask what my plans were.

Sorry, we cross-posted! But, same here!! That was just the weirdest thing. Also, a week later I came in and wished her a happy new year. Then there was just the longest silence, which was extremely uncomfortable. Surely there is nothing wrong with wishing someone a happy new year? Or is there?

quote:

Originally posted by Mayflower:

quote:

Originally posted by LadyGrey:
My T2 didn't even wish me a merry xmas or ask what my plans were.

Sorry, we cross-posted! But, same here!! That was just the weirdest thing. Also, a week later I came in and wished her a happy new year. Then there was just the longest silence, which was extremely uncomfortable. Surely there is nothing wrong with wishing someone a happy new year? Or is there?

I can't see how there could possibly be anything wrong with wishing someone a happy new year. It's a "safe" holiday. Both my Ts acknowledged it and wished me happy new year.

My T texted me Merry Christmas and Happy Thanksgiving, but not on the actual days, just on the last time we communicated before his vacations.

I saw him on my birthday in December and he said Happy Birthday, but he kind of had to. He tried to NOT see me on my birthday (just because another day worked better) and I had particularly told him how much I needed to. Long story short, the two sides of the family that are not getting along because of the horrible, traumatic incident that I cannot say on here without probably triggering people (and making them all hate me) were in the same room for my birthday for the first time since I found out about it. It was awkward and horrible and made me feel so divided. He asked me if I could do the next day instead and I texted him that it honestly hurt me, because we had been talking for a few weeks about how hard this day was going to be on me. So, having been just the day before reminded I was about to have a horrible birthday experience, he couldn't really have helped but acknowledge my birthday, I guess.

Yaku, that sounds horrible. I can't quite understand why he would go to such lengths to avoid having to see you at your birthday. Especially given the circumstances.

But, more importantly, I don't think anyone here would hate you for sharing this traumatic incident with us. ( I, for one, would not!!). So, please, if it'd do you any good, share it with us.

T didn't try to avoid it on purpose and apologized profusely. He was just absent-minded and really didn't remember me having specifically said how important it was to see him that day...and even that I had been thinking about doing some pretty bad stuff that day too. Not cool to "forget" that sort of thing, but I was able to receive his apology and be fine with it, because he was so sincere and as soon as I was honest with him, he immediately opened up his 9:00 pm for me.

As far as the traumatic incident goes, I had posted it here but edited it out, because it has nothing to do with birthdays and I realized I inadvertently took over the thread. Not sure if I will post elsewhere or not yet. It seems kind of insensitive of me to randomly post a triggering thread like, "OK, who wants to know about this really $#!++4 think that happened?"

On my first birthday with oldT he just said "I want to wish you a very Happy Birthday" ... he knew because it was a session with my son and my son who was 8 at the time told him because he was excited.

On my next birthday which was a beautiful day, I brought in donuts and a book I was reading that had resonated with me. So we ate dounts and I read to him some passages from the book and we talked about them and then at the end of the session he VERY unexpectedly hugged me for the first time. I was quite shocked. Needless to say it was a very memorable day.

The following birthday I had an emergency session with him. I looked awful, dressed in all black and was hysterically crying most of the day and numb and terrified the other parts of the day. He called me in because the day before we had an awful session and he checked on me the following day and I was sobbing home alone so he felt I should go in to see him. We spent 90 minutes talking about why he thought I should leave and I sobbed and told him why I thought I should stay with him. At the end of the session he hugged me twice and gave me a small food gift. It was a very traumatic day.

I knew his birthday because he told me the month and then I found it on line. I gave him a card on one birthday and then a card and a small gift on the next birthday. It was hard on his recent birthday that I was not able to acknowledge it in any way and it made me very sad.

TN