Hi Butterfly Warrior,
I was wondering if you had a chance to talk to your ex-T's supervisor? And any luck at finding a new supervisor?
AG
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Hello-
I just fouind this now... dont know when it was typed... for some reason.. ididnt see a highlighted thing to tell me it was new but than it stuck out to me by chance as I was getting ready to post about this topic... LOL.
I talked to the therapist supervisor yesterday FINALLY. You know, i was disturbed on so many levels. I had called her last week and she did not return my call. I was not sure if i should take this as a accident or if i should take this as... we're not interested in hearing from our psycho clients! lol.
So i incidently fmixed up my psychiatrist appointment this past monday .. its actually today *thursday and so i went down to wehre Dr Z is. She was in with a cxlient so i left a message. She did call me wed and she was nice but i could sooo tell that they are NOT interested in client feedback. Well Excuuuse me! Gee... i guess I have been spoiled by my university counseling center that was very very good and very interested in what students had to say in wanted to know. I would think places would want to know even if they needed to take it with a grain fo salt but guess I was wrong!
So, i sorta just said i was feeling kinda odd as Ive never done 'this' before so she said something like... 'yeh... well sometimes a match just doesdnt work out" which was matter of fact.. true but i guess i expected them to ASk me more.. I mean i wanted them to and i sorta tried to leave the space open to do so but NOPE went No where. So i asked her what should i do if i run into a crisis or something and she said that i should call my psychiatrist. That's news to me... lol. So than she asked me who I had and I said Dr Hadley so she said Oh good that Allison was very responsive.
THis kinda made me laugh inside my head because I haqve had strange interactions with her. I still have not formed a real opinion of her accept that the last time I did see her, I had mentioned that I wasnt sure that I liked my therapist so when she finds out that I fired her, Im sure she won't be that suprised. Anyways, the reason i cant figure her out.. dr hadley that is ... is because we have had some weird interactions. I dont think she asks enough.... i think she's a little clueless. She also does kind aoff things that throw me off like the first time i saw her... she had asked me if i had a therapist and when I said yes, her response was "Oh good.. less paperwork"!! Okay.... so maybe thats true and good but gee it was kinda RUDE to say that in front of me. I wanted to say... well Excuuuse me for living! lol. So than the last time is aw her... and mind you. i have missed a few appts wirth her.. not common for me to do....im pretty strict about amking it to appointments and not missing but things got in the way like the huge fires in san diego and than my back going out.. things like that.... she would call to check on me whichj was cool and unexpected. Anyways, the last time i was there, we have 30 min appts and someone came to the door like right at the 30 min mark. I wasnt sure who it was but she just LET THEM IN.... she said.. Oh.. my next meeting... our time is up.. oops... and she let them in!!! Im sitting there in my power chair like HUH.. what.... Helloooooooo..... lol. I figured the person couldnt be a client through deductive logic.... the waiting room is locked so clients can't just stroll in... so i assumed it was a professional so that made the behavior SLIGHTLY better but Not by much. SO I ask her kinda shyly about med refils and than she says Oh yeh... flies out to make sure the nurse is in and in the mean time im turning arouind in her office and this big guy is sitting there and im like.. ummm.. hehe.. umm HI.... and kinda feeling totally off. He said hi back but yeh.. i was really taken aback by this. SO like i said.. she seems nice but is kinda clueless beyond what I can deal with.... lol. So her being 'responsive' seems rather like an oxymoron from my current standpoint. We will see how tomorrow goes. Sigh.
Also with Dr Z (supervisor) i mentioned or asked her about her role in matching clients with therapists and she siad she does play a role in that and did i want to cont. therapy next time? I said yes so she said Oh okay cause adrine didnt know for sure. I was thinking.. gee thanks for asking people!! I guess they were just going to leave it to the air to find out. I really felt like a number and i guess they are a huge operation and handle a lot of people but i couldnt help but to wonder if i was actully someone with real insurance, would i be treated this way.. probably not. Because im in a clinic with people who aqre pretty mentally unfunctional.... they treat you like that. They see im very high functuoning but very poor and fell through the system cracks so i get to see how they act.... and i dont like it. I can't control it but it bothers me. Im glad they exist but it makes me see how some people with worse problems can end up getting sicker or getting hospitaliszed due to the ineptitude and lack of follow up etc on the part of their system whicxh can allow clients to get worse and end up in a worse state. Anyways... bah..
So she asked me about some things she can consider for matching me so i just said.. .well.. it would nbe nice to have a female of course and always and that they havr at least SOME expereince in treating trauma. That I know they are learning but SOME will help! (guess that gave indirect feedback of how i felt.... lol). I also mentioned.... well i tried to mention it would be nice if they understood chronic illness but it didnt quite come oput like that. I saod.. well... you know.. i guess i was Really lucky with Holly. I eanted to go on and say... well i did say.. with her having Arthritis and all. she broke in and said.. Oh yes.. you two had a lot on common and not ony that she was a really excepptional therapist... very incredibly gentle yet firm. I said yeh... I had told her that when she finishes her post-doc that I hope she does therapy cause if she doesnt continue on as a therapist, it will e a real loss to the world!.
SO there were some other non essential things but that was pretty much it.
I'm pretty dissapointed but I guess I have a lot more faith in people in the mental health field than I should and so I feel upset. I really thought I could somehow be helpful but they arent interste and i dont feel very much hope for what happens next. I guess I just got very very fortunate my first exposure to the place with Holly and even my psychiatrist last year.... so this year is kinda a bust so far and next year.. who knows. I don't like hjow this is making me look like im someone in need of chronic mental health services when they are the ones that have been inadequate now. A whole year wasted... i wonder whats in my chart.... ugh...
long post.... long answer! lol....
Issadora
I just fouind this now... dont know when it was typed... for some reason.. ididnt see a highlighted thing to tell me it was new but than it stuck out to me by chance as I was getting ready to post about this topic... LOL.
I talked to the therapist supervisor yesterday FINALLY. You know, i was disturbed on so many levels. I had called her last week and she did not return my call. I was not sure if i should take this as a accident or if i should take this as... we're not interested in hearing from our psycho clients! lol.
So i incidently fmixed up my psychiatrist appointment this past monday .. its actually today *thursday and so i went down to wehre Dr Z is. She was in with a cxlient so i left a message. She did call me wed and she was nice but i could sooo tell that they are NOT interested in client feedback. Well Excuuuse me! Gee... i guess I have been spoiled by my university counseling center that was very very good and very interested in what students had to say in wanted to know. I would think places would want to know even if they needed to take it with a grain fo salt but guess I was wrong!
So, i sorta just said i was feeling kinda odd as Ive never done 'this' before so she said something like... 'yeh... well sometimes a match just doesdnt work out" which was matter of fact.. true but i guess i expected them to ASk me more.. I mean i wanted them to and i sorta tried to leave the space open to do so but NOPE went No where. So i asked her what should i do if i run into a crisis or something and she said that i should call my psychiatrist. That's news to me... lol. So than she asked me who I had and I said Dr Hadley so she said Oh good that Allison was very responsive.
THis kinda made me laugh inside my head because I haqve had strange interactions with her. I still have not formed a real opinion of her accept that the last time I did see her, I had mentioned that I wasnt sure that I liked my therapist so when she finds out that I fired her, Im sure she won't be that suprised. Anyways, the reason i cant figure her out.. dr hadley that is ... is because we have had some weird interactions. I dont think she asks enough.... i think she's a little clueless. She also does kind aoff things that throw me off like the first time i saw her... she had asked me if i had a therapist and when I said yes, her response was "Oh good.. less paperwork"!! Okay.... so maybe thats true and good but gee it was kinda RUDE to say that in front of me. I wanted to say... well Excuuuse me for living! lol. So than the last time is aw her... and mind you. i have missed a few appts wirth her.. not common for me to do....im pretty strict about amking it to appointments and not missing but things got in the way like the huge fires in san diego and than my back going out.. things like that.... she would call to check on me whichj was cool and unexpected. Anyways, the last time i was there, we have 30 min appts and someone came to the door like right at the 30 min mark. I wasnt sure who it was but she just LET THEM IN.... she said.. Oh.. my next meeting... our time is up.. oops... and she let them in!!! Im sitting there in my power chair like HUH.. what.... Helloooooooo..... lol. I figured the person couldnt be a client through deductive logic.... the waiting room is locked so clients can't just stroll in... so i assumed it was a professional so that made the behavior SLIGHTLY better but Not by much. SO I ask her kinda shyly about med refils and than she says Oh yeh... flies out to make sure the nurse is in and in the mean time im turning arouind in her office and this big guy is sitting there and im like.. ummm.. hehe.. umm HI.... and kinda feeling totally off. He said hi back but yeh.. i was really taken aback by this. SO like i said.. she seems nice but is kinda clueless beyond what I can deal with.... lol. So her being 'responsive' seems rather like an oxymoron from my current standpoint. We will see how tomorrow goes. Sigh.
Also with Dr Z (supervisor) i mentioned or asked her about her role in matching clients with therapists and she siad she does play a role in that and did i want to cont. therapy next time? I said yes so she said Oh okay cause adrine didnt know for sure. I was thinking.. gee thanks for asking people!! I guess they were just going to leave it to the air to find out. I really felt like a number and i guess they are a huge operation and handle a lot of people but i couldnt help but to wonder if i was actully someone with real insurance, would i be treated this way.. probably not. Because im in a clinic with people who aqre pretty mentally unfunctional.... they treat you like that. They see im very high functuoning but very poor and fell through the system cracks so i get to see how they act.... and i dont like it. I can't control it but it bothers me. Im glad they exist but it makes me see how some people with worse problems can end up getting sicker or getting hospitaliszed due to the ineptitude and lack of follow up etc on the part of their system whicxh can allow clients to get worse and end up in a worse state. Anyways... bah..
So she asked me about some things she can consider for matching me so i just said.. .well.. it would nbe nice to have a female of course and always and that they havr at least SOME expereince in treating trauma. That I know they are learning but SOME will help! (guess that gave indirect feedback of how i felt.... lol). I also mentioned.... well i tried to mention it would be nice if they understood chronic illness but it didnt quite come oput like that. I saod.. well... you know.. i guess i was Really lucky with Holly. I eanted to go on and say... well i did say.. with her having Arthritis and all. she broke in and said.. Oh yes.. you two had a lot on common and not ony that she was a really excepptional therapist... very incredibly gentle yet firm. I said yeh... I had told her that when she finishes her post-doc that I hope she does therapy cause if she doesnt continue on as a therapist, it will e a real loss to the world!.
SO there were some other non essential things but that was pretty much it.
I'm pretty dissapointed but I guess I have a lot more faith in people in the mental health field than I should and so I feel upset. I really thought I could somehow be helpful but they arent interste and i dont feel very much hope for what happens next. I guess I just got very very fortunate my first exposure to the place with Holly and even my psychiatrist last year.... so this year is kinda a bust so far and next year.. who knows. I don't like hjow this is making me look like im someone in need of chronic mental health services when they are the ones that have been inadequate now. A whole year wasted... i wonder whats in my chart.... ugh...
long post.... long answer! lol....
Issadora
BW,
That sounds incredibly frustrating, although I am glad they at least did call you back. You would think in a teaching situation, especially, they would be interested in as much feedback as they could get. I'm glad that you are able to advocate for yourself. I hope you get a better match on the next go round. But I think its really good that you trusted yourself enough to know when to get out. Keep us posted.
AG
PS I like your long posts. Helps make mine stand out less.
That sounds incredibly frustrating, although I am glad they at least did call you back. You would think in a teaching situation, especially, they would be interested in as much feedback as they could get. I'm glad that you are able to advocate for yourself. I hope you get a better match on the next go round. But I think its really good that you trusted yourself enough to know when to get out. Keep us posted.
AG
PS I like your long posts. Helps make mine stand out less.
LOL AG.. thank you for your support