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Hello,

Last night I was having a really hard time…AGAIN. I was thinking about my former T and I was afraid I was going to call her or even worse, drive down the street to her office. I knew if I acted on these feelings I would feel like a fool and regret it. So, hesitantly, I emailed my new T to tell her what I was feeling. My longing for my ex-T was quickly replaced with embarrassment that I had emailed my new T with such a foolish thing. Especially since I knew she was on vacation. She replied with some thoughtful words and suggested that I call the crisis line. I did not call the crisis line and I found other ways to distract myself. But has anybody ever used one of these crisis lines? I may call tonight just to see what it’s like. If anybody has any input, knowledge, or concerns of this type of thing, please let me know.

Thanks,
-Stuck
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Hi Stuck -
I have actually recently used crisis lines in the last two weeks. My T was on vacation last week, and our last meeting prior to her vacation was not a good one. I was missing her, and having a very difficult time. I ended up calling twice, and I have to say I was not happy with the experience. Each time I called, it was in the middle of the night, I was distressed and in tears. The first time, I didn't care for the woman's voice, so I know that was my own issue, but the second time I called, a few days later, during the conversation the woman asked me to "hold on for a minute", proceeded to put me on hold, and when she came back said "what were we talking about?". My crisis may not have been as bad as what someone may have been going through, but I felt as if I was dismissed. I was crying at the time, so I felt that my needs were not being met.
That is just my personal account and opinion of the situation.
Hopefully you will have a better experience if you need to use one of these lines.

GG
Hi Stuck,

I'm sorry it has been so difficult for you lately. I know the feeling of wanting that contact with an ex-T and how hard it is to be unable to connect with them because it's "forbidden". It can really make you feel crazy.

I would recommend this Crisis Line:

315-251-0600

It's in the U.S. and is not toll free.

I hope things get easier for you.

TN
Hey Stuck,

Am wondering if it would be helpful to give yourself permission to write a letter to your old T when you are wanting to connect with her? it might help to get some of that stuff out...and then later, you can burn it, delete it, or...perhaps send it if you still want to, after thinking about it for 48 hours or so?
Hi Stuck...I am sorry to hear that things are still so rough. I don't know about a crisis line, I've never used one, but I just wanted to chime in with my support. I think writing the letter to your oldT is a great idea. You could even post it here unless that would be too weird for you.

I hope some of the pain alleviates soon. I'm glad you have a T who is helping somewhat.

sending hugs,

BB
I have called the crisis hotline on several occasions, most recently last April. It was a very bad time for me- issues with abandonment, abuse, transference. I tried all day to reach my T and at 9 PM I called the crisis line. It helped me a lot. I had turned his lack of response into more abandonment- not being important enough, etc. The crisis line helped me look at the reality. The guy even said, maybe his kid's are sick, etc. My T ended up texting me at midnight. Calling a crisis line sure won't hurt especially if it's all you have.

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