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This is finally beginning to happen with me. It never occurred to me that, of course, this is how the healing and learning takes place. It is just hard to get there (as we all know).

Think about it; it's kind of like the intellect can learn to take the emotions by the hand and begin to walk next to each other insync, with no judgement, just understanding, honesty and gentleness. Things we never learned or knew how to do. Granted, it is a painfully slow process and we've all wanted to give up and been tortured walking through these trenches. But, I want to tell anyone who is interested that I am starting to feel this connection within myself. I notice I am standing up straighter and feeling like I am deserving for the first time in my life. There is a sense of worth developing that I've never known. I am liking this. I have a ways to go but the amazing gift is no one can ever take away what I've learned and worked towards....ever!

Does this make sense to anyone?
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VH,
Poking my head out for just a moment (stuff going on right now which is leaving me very little energy so I am not posting) to tell you it makes immense sense to me.

I assiduously avoided my feelings because they were experienced as so threatening when I was a child, due to lack of resources and any kind of attachment in which I could learn to regulate them. But the problem is that our feelings are what gives life meaning, and provide us with valuable knowledge about ourselves so that we can fully engage in life while taking good care of ourselves. Being cut off from our feelings is to be cut off from ourselves.

OTOH, running solely on emotion can be just as disastrous a course to follow as our feelings are not always the best reflection of reality nor the best guide to action.

I think leading a balanced, healthy full life means being aware of and regulating our feelings so that we can take them fully into account when we are thinking through how we choose to act. Both things serve us well.

And I think the increased sense of worth comes from knowing and accepting who we truly are. I also think we learn a sense of worth from having our feelings treated as worthwhile and worth listening to. Everything you said resonated very strongly with me. Hug two

Going back into hiding now.

AG

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