hopeful - did you ask to see the notes or ask if she remembered and/or wrote it down? sometimes my t will flip back to another day in her notes if she's trying to bring something up, but I don't think she writes what she says. my Ts have amazing memories and recall all kinds of stuff my regular T will sometimes bring stuff up she's said that she thinks triggered me. It sounds like your t kind of got defensive or something that's why I ask if you wanted to SEE the notes or not because Ts can...Read More...

Jane, Wanted to send you a big ol' hug and tell you that I understand where you are coming from. Transitions are SO hard. Any change is difficult and the only thing that gets me through is the hope that it will get better. It will improve. It has to, right? Sometimes I am at a loss and feel like day to day life is pointless but then I try to remind myself of little things I do. I smile at a stranger--that person might have been having a bad day and I changed their outlook. I help people on...Read More...

((((BG))))) Sucks beyond belief. It has been really painful for me to come to grips with this truth about my mother. That the reason I kept getting hurt was that I kept going back hoping she would be different and respond differently. It was a grief to let go of ever having her be the person I wanted her to be or even being a person I could have a better relationship with. But oddly enough, once I faced that and accepted that, it actually has become less painful to interact with her. But I...Read More...

Good luck with your session Hoosier! In the past I've celebrated anniversaries to the extent that I gave my T a card the first year. The second year we had a session on the exact day and I brought up that it had been two years. This year our third anniversary was this past Sunday. I didn't say anything, T didn't either and I don't plan to. We aren't on great terms right now so I'm not if we'll have a fourth or not. I've given my T small homemade gifts and cards for various occasions. I don't...Read More...

I see no problem with having some sub-forums that are always open to newbies and seasoned members alike so they can get to know each other and get a feel for the board, but that perhaps the open area should be limited to the less triggering topics and everyday chatting and fun games. As newbies settled in and made several posts in the open forums (and thus showed they were not trolls and were serious about membership), they could "graduate" into access to the private forums. I also see no...Read More...

I hadn't seen it. Thanks for posting, I loved it! ~D.Read More...

Scattered, Thank you so much for both your candor and your kindness. I felt your sincerity, and I know you speak from the heart. Thank you. I know you're right. I'm scared and don't think I want to delve into any of this right now. But if/when I do, it'll be as you said - with my T, and... this support network, I'm sure. My heart goes out to you for facing and enduring the challenges you're forced to deal with, and I admire your courage. StarryRead More...

ooops! i didn't mean to actually post that just yet ... i meant to elaborate a little. anyway, i don't think i'm a boundary pusher, BUT i do think that i tend to see others as "how can i benefit from this relationship"? sure, i can put up a front and communicate like anybody, like i'm on the up=and=up, but i'm thinking you struck something close to my core and that's why i'm posting now. i'm thinking (not proudly) that on some deep level i do look at other as "what can you provide me with"?Read More...

fRead More...

Hi anna, I'm so sorry about your past and how much you're hurting *hugs* I can understand why you are so distrusting of everyone else, people around you broke your trust in bad ways, you just learnt how to defend yourself. The first time I read your reply I felt your T wasn't the right person for you, he sounded way too unpredictable and not safe enough for you to anchor on him, but after learning it took you 2 years to trust him... that's a big investment and you shouldn't dismiss it so...Read More...

((R2G)) I've heard that hardware store story before, I think in DBT! IT does make sense, I'm really impressed at the way you turn the conversation around... I need to try that. The problem with my Mom when she is drinking she gets very talkative and a little hostile if I try to break contact. So I need to stop myself before I call in the first place. It's hard when I'm freaking out I know it took you a long time but it's inspiring to hear that you've gotten to the point you have. I want to...Read More...

Awesome SG and so very true!! Thanks.Read More...

yup!Read More...

It was just released in theaters-- might have a limited showing, but it's one of those films that will go worldwide, for sure. Thanks for the sweet words and the hugs. Bullying is such an epidemic in schools and hoping awareness will improve this situation for my children.Read More...

I really enjoyed this book, it helped me be aware that my T must care a little about me which I really struggle to believed LuciRead More...

(((((BB)))))) Thank you so much for popping in. I hope you don't delete because you said everything so gracefully and beautifully. Your post was very honest, especially the following: I default to resentment and jealousy just as you do. I do think it is a good thing to acknowledge that life is and can be unfair but then to move on from there. And maybe I too suffer a bit from wanting to live in some kind of utopian world. But if we didn't have a vision of something better than ourselves,...Read More...

Beautiful!Read More...

R, I haven't even read anyone elses responses I am just going to say what I truly believe and that is NO. No I do not think you should contact them or get involved with them again. I know someone very close to me who did that with (drug addict friends) and they are now dead. What seemed like a good idea turned out to be a turning point in their life, that they would later regret and a turning point that saw them OD. So my answer is NO. Sound harsh? Maybe, but then I think death is a little...Read More...

((BB)) Hey you - I had to take a bit before bravely clicking the read button because I'm going through some... stuff with my own stuff right now! But then I saw it poofed! Which... I understand... I do that lots. I have TONS of reasons to justify my relapses or justify clinging on to things because I don't want to lose them. Even my ED stuff right now... I've talked myself in to why it's happening a few times. Not really sure if that was what this was about. Hope you are doing okay bb...Read More...

Hey there Brokes, thanks for the welcome back . May I extend the same welcome back to you too - it's hard to keep away from here isn't it? LLRead More...

(((B2w))) thanks for that reply. Rationally I can understand that my mother has her own issues but I wish I could *feel* it. That's actually one of the things my T insisted on, that this is not my fault, and I can understand that my mother has problems, I can understand the importance of it not being about me, but I still don't *feel* it. Will it ever sink in? What a bad time for my T going on holidays, I'll only see him in another week so I'm on my own here Thank God I decided to get...Read More...

We forgot to put on our peep names this year! doh!Read More...

No, Quell, I think that is a very good beginning of your story with T. You are safe to say to him whatever you need to. He understands. And if you do find out down the road that you love him, well now you know that feeling is okay and accepted. I'm glad you asked. Hugs TNRead More...

Muff, you are so wise.Read More...