Update: Deepie your advice was spot on. T agreed that for people like me I need to be super relaxed and calm before I can start to imprint a safe place in my mind and she said that yes I will need to practice and practice to get the peaceful feelings to be associated with it. I downloaded a mp3 recording of some breathing mindfulness to do when i sit at my special place. I also looked at some things on youtube to help me as well as reading about it. I just need to keep trying.Read More...

Oh, from my perspective, it seems really clear that he is trying to correct your internal interpretation that he doesn't care, by reminding you that there are times when you can feel his care, so that your current feelings of his not caring are shown to be false to you. I think he is trying to remind you of the times when you felt good and safe with him, not just trying to nit-pick the way you speak..it's because what you say can become internalized so he wants to undo the message- "he...Read More...

Thanks! I needed a laugh. Sorry to hear about the surgery and no driving for two weeks. That stinks! I don't think it's fair that these Ts of ours take breaks over the holidays, either. My T will be out for a while too so it will be 3 weeks for me between sessions. After weekly appts. that feels like forever. I too would be shutting down except that I'm too mad at my T to be doing so right now. I think she's even forgotten that this next week she would typically be calling me if she gets a...Read More...

Thank you TN, thank you Kashley. (((TN and Kashley))) TN, I don't really miss the touch on the arm...I just *notice* it when he doesn't do it, and feel mildly curious, why he does that sometimes, and not others. I wonder if it has to do with, if I am feeling bad, or have been crying? that's a thought- maybe that was why he did it before. Somehow that is quite a concept for me! sheesh. I almost wish I had the same reactions and intensity of feelings in therapy as I did with Guru, but I just...Read More...

((((DF)))) Sorry for the delay, DF. I'm glad your Ts have been supportive of the decisions you've made regarding your parents. One the one hand it feels good to hear T say that she'd support me no matter what, but of course I also question that and think...really? It's a hard thing to truly take to heart. Thanks for the support. The turmoil over this stuff, on top of 7 exams and 2 presentations over the next couple weeks, is just tearing me apart. On a positive note, since my mother is down...Read More...

chuck them in, dear echos, chuck them in. They take about twenty minutes, I think. You can rinse them first, if you want.Read More...

Hey Unbroken, Way to go on making a timeline, although I don't doubt how tremendously painful it must have been to see everything you've been through written out. I've never made one. There's a lot of holes still in my memories, so it would be tough because of that, but also because (like Beebs) I don't know if I want to have a really clear picture. I am SO happy for you that you have a supportive T and that you're feeling more connected than ever. How fantastic. Just take things at your own...Read More...

Hey Louba and Little Me, (love the names) welcome and yes, do take very good care of yourselves. It makes a difference.Read More...

(((Flutters))) this is just so good to hear - yeah I know, one swallow does not a summer make, but really you sound very hopeful and positive and your're going to see her again - that's just great!! s, MorgsRead More...

HI Megan and welcome. I too have BPD and I too have been unceremoniously terminated by a T like True North has. Mine happened 3 months ago and it is very raw. At times I get so frustrated with that "process" that every talks about and everyone says to trust. But I am realy pleased to say that I am beginning to see what they are going on about. I have been to this T various times over the past 15 years and she is no stranger to me, in fact we had outside contact and worked together. We have...Read More...

Thanks Tessa, I read your blog and can relate a little. I too suffer from anxiety as part of the PTSD package. Thanks for sharing your journey. And most of all... MayoRead More...

Hey TN, Just wanted to say that I was thinking of you and hoping that your session today goes well.Read More...

Blanket Girl, thank you for posting links to my blogs. I stopped in just to say that there is considerable research showing bias about weight among healthcare professionals and no evidence to suggest that mental health professionals are as a group are any different. Many of us who are fat carry those same biases internally and working our way through them is in itself a considerable journey. It takes courage to tell a therapist that of course there are issues that flow from being the object...Read More...

Thank you, xoxo- I found your reply and the link very helpful. It is interesting that people with dysthymia often think they have ADD- I have long been convinced that I have that, without the hyperactive component, because my concentration and ability to complete things is so poor, and can lead to further depression and feelings of worthlessness. I hope you will feel better, soon, too, xoxo. Like you, I had no idea how bad things really were, simply because I have always been used to feeling...Read More...

Hi guys, thankyou so much for your advice! You know my preoccupied thinking has rendered me unable to work now because I have thought so negatively about my life circumstances for such a long time. I can only do work which stimulates me massively now. (As in change of scenes constantly and moving around) BB: You are absolutely right. Moving and doing creative and physical activity works a lot. I cannot do sitting down work anymore. I have develop an actual fear of office work because I...Read More...

Hey Incognito - that sounds like a great start to renegotiate your relationship. Well done for telling T that you angry - I think this is one of the hardest things to do. SDRead More...

Thank you dear starfishy and lampers...your loving words and happiness for me make me feel warm inside. Love, BeebsRead More...

i went second hand clothes shopping in the city recently and am inspired. thinking about it now, clothing is like a garden, style built on a strong foundation. i bought a wool skirt made in new york and it is fabulous if i can figure out how to shrink the pictures my camera takes, u'll see.Read More...

Thanks everyone! Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! All of the people here are high up on my list of what I'm thankful for. AGRead More...

Thanks for the understanding LL. I didn't get an appointment with her this week. The best she could do is next Thursday. I did at least tell her I was upset with her and she expressed surprise at that. Which of course made me mad since she doesn't even recognize that she's left me hanging out here. Grrrr. I won't do anything until I talk to her but I am resigned that this will create a significant breach in our relationship which I don't know can be mended. But thanks for your kind words.Read More...

xoxo, I love your insight and for your struggle. I've too recognized that I seem to drift in and out of different states of being and I'm unsure which one I prefer. I have the state where I think I'm bored and anxious. I tend to talk to myself a lot and be a bit silly with myself, doing silly things in a very childish manner. I keep that state to myself at all times, but it tends to come out at random times when I'm at home. Dress really affects me, especially coats. I know it sounds maybe a...Read More...

PM if you need to talk.Read More...

Well i guess i should throw some links up. There are federal, state/province, and professional laws and codes. Some of these pertain only in the U.S., but some of the links include Canada as well as a variety of professional associations. I don't know too much about the UK, sorry. People should keep in mind that when multiple laws, codes, or professional standards are involved, often the most conservative-strictest supercedes the others. Here are places/links where you can find most of the...Read More...

Good discussions came of this, and she clearly wasn't frustrated with it at all... The logical adult in me knew that. I just wish I could convince the rest of me sometimes. Things would be so much easier. I have hated my job for a long time, and finally took the leap to accept another position and quit. It felt great! Except... Now I realize this is going to mess with my schedule with my T. I emailed explaining this as soon as I knew - Apologizing for the inconvenience. She replied right...Read More...

Hi Quell, Really up to you where you post it. You could put it in Personal Story, Questions or Coffee Talk. Substance Abuse also springs to mind. Any of those forums would be fine. A trigger warning would be good wherever you post it. The forum categories, with the exception of Chit Chat, aren't really hard and fast rules. The point is more that people can use the categories to find what they're looking for. The only reason Chit Chat is an exception is that we try to keep this trigger free...Read More...