Hi Inis, I hope you won't be offended but your subject line made me laugh. Not laughing at you, just the fact that T's have this stereotype for a reason, eh? My T is not a frequent head nodder, only occasionally does she do it. When she does do it, however, its usually accompanied by a tight-lipped smile as though she's trying to suppress her thoughts from being known, even though obviously I said something that she found to be funny or ironic. I can't quite imagine what she looks like...Read More...

((((((DF)))))) I am late to the thread and you have already resolved it, but I am going to respond to your initial post anyway....just in case this issue comes up again, or if someone else has a similar concern and reads this thread looking for some input... I just wanted to say that even in relationships where money isn't exchanged to keep it going, people make calculations in how they are going to interact with people. It doesn't make the relationship less real in doing so. I know it may...Read More...

I'm still new to this therapy thing and T unfortunately missed the boat on commemorating it, because he didn't answer my question about it soon enough. So, he didn't understand at the time what I was doing, but I told him later. I gave him a hand-made sock monkey. It is on display on the shelving that is attacked to the top of his desk. He now gets it out immediately when I come to the office, along with turning the lights down for me. I guess it's as much a gift for me as him, though, since...Read More...

Hi Liese, Nice to meet you too. Where is your name from? Ah yes the word 'nothing'. I guess one can always make something out of nothing. We talked today about it. She mentioned that I must be willing to express myself in any way I wish for the therapy to work. I kept telling her that I never want to get angry at her. She asked why and I said 'because you are nice and I don't want to make you angry'. She was nice about it. However I am so sensitive that I might be willing to become very...Read More...

There's a whole description as to what each interval on the scale means as far as functioning goes..I can post it if you like. It's also readily available on Wikipedia and stuff. I range from probably around 41-60, sometimes on the lower end of that (like right now), sometimes on the higher end. You'll get to that upper range, Liese. And you're right, all that matters is getting to the point where you're content where you are. Maybe people in the upper 90's are too happy.Read More...

hi BG, i think that's a good idea to focus on forgiving yourself and i love what you wrote : i think that's so powerful and makes me start to look at forgiveness from a different perspective. AG, thank you for your words of wisdom and especially for your very moving story. the second book you mentioned looks very interesting, i might look into it! which shows that i'm definetely more at the not forgiving end of the spectrum, but I'm ok with that. everyone's replies really helped me to look...Read More...

Short and sweet.Read More...

(((Draggers))) I have to tell you stuff in PM, because I'm after writing stuff, I'm apparently "not allowed" to post it here. But, I did not get another handshake, because we ended the session in kind of a different way, as I had a rough time with potential memory stuff and T walked me out to my car, since I was in an unfamiliar area. He also called, as he forgot to check if I was comfortable with the directions home, and said he'd leave his phone on for 40 minutes in case I got turned...Read More...

Thanks BB and LG. I agree with both of you. Thanks to all for the much needed support!Read More...

That's SO awesome! Great job!!!Read More...

I've had one dream so far about mine. I was cycling down the road back from my previous job. I saw her walking down the sidewalk holding sipping on a cup of tea. I desperately wanted to walk past her so that she would notice me and say something. Then I'm on some sort of gokart going past some shops and all I can think about is 'She's around here somewhere. Where?'. I felt nervous and a bit saddened in the dream because I knew I could not get to know her. I was very confused as to where she...Read More...

Hey heldincompassion, No problem. Thanks for your lovely post. I'm in a very mixed state of confusion at the moment. I've been lately feeling that I live in a variety of subtle masks that are tailor made to fit the world and for each person too. My childhood ups and downs were absolutely normal from aged 0. So I often find it very hard to understand emotions. Sometimes I really nitpick and ask friends what it 'feels' like to feel this or be inspired etc. I've had a grueling 2 weeks and I...Read More...

Thanks guys...I imagine I am probably posting as much as many of the members do, though! It's just I posted *so* much before, and was constantly here...so I felt I owed a little bit of explanation, why I am not around so much! Still here, still posting when I can! Love you all- BeebsRead More...

(((starfishy))) (((Draggers))) (((Jones))) Thanks for all the support. Yeah, H is over there until Wednesday, the 21st, a few days before Boo's birthday. If it hadn't been for her birthday, he would have been there even longer. They tried to schedule his trip such that he would be flying back ON her birthday. But, he said that he wouldn't go unless he could be back at least a few days to get adjusted to the time, so he could really celebrate his daughter's 3rd birthday with her. So, Jones,...Read More...

Well, I have been in therapy for about a year. But, mostly during this year I have mostly been "trying out" therapists. I have tried 3 or 4. Wednesday I have an appointment with the first counselor I had seen. I like him (and have always liked him). He had said some insightful things to me. We just had an issue that we could not agree on and he would not let it go. I am hoping that we can work it out this time.Read More...

Hi CNC My T did some CBT on me a while ago to conquer a certain fear I had speaking in public. It was challenging in that I had to: really look at why I felt that fear and behaved how I did; had homework tasks that invariably pushed me a little (note, not too much if not it won't work ....neither will too little ); BUT OMG it really worked! The fear was overcome to a great extent in a matter of a few weeks, I continued to work on it for several months and it has never returned. I would NEVER...Read More...

Thanks, to you too, Puppet and Yaku! I wanted to come back and reply to the posts from before...I have not had any time, between all the stuff that has been happening around here. I haven't even got a chance to read any of the threads much, besides not being able to reply to them.. I just wanted to mention that Liese's reply, really gave me some insight into the idea that a T could have negative feelings about dependency in a client, viewing it as something "bad" and that could contribute to...Read More...

Awwww TN that is fab. LOVE your new avatar and the reasons behind it. Makes me think I shall do some thinking on mine xxRead More...

Hey Yaku, Sorry I was late to come to this and your other thread...how are things going today? Really pleased for you that things are moving forward with the touch issue! Also, even though it may have seemed embarrassing at first, I like the way your T framed the whole anniversary thing. At the very least, it hopefully has made it a little easier to contemplate sharing some other anniversaries or birthdays in the future? I'm sorry it seems like you may have to have a daytime session and that...Read More...

Hi heldincompassion, Nice to meet you on here> I think I have a big tendency to intellectualize absolutely everything that I am not familiar with. For the past week I have tried to work out what I feel, what I don't but unfortunately it hasn't really drawn much conclusion out but confusion and panic. I find it hard to 'let go'. I'm not sure what that means anyway. I will follow your advice and talk to her about it. Thank you I hope your therapy is going well.Read More...

((((INCOGNITO)))) You sound so much better. And the discussion with your T was so comforting. I was thinking about how he had compassion for you even if you didn't have it for yourself: that he wasn't angry you were searching through the facebook, that he realized that you were only trying to connect, that it wasn't such a great way for you to feel connected to him as it only brought more shame up for you on top of the fact that you weren't even actually connecting with him and that he...Read More...

Hi Butterfly, thank you for your kind reply. I still haven't heard anything and have started to think that, for whatever reason, she won't be getting in touch with me. Do you think that telling her she is the nicest person in the world was too strong and could have frightened her off?Read More...

Thanks Yaku, I have been wondering if it's time to ask former T about asking me to leave. I just don't know if I'm ready for that yet. She has asked me to come back to couples counseling but with my strong feelings for her, I think that would be so painful and my new T agrees. My new T said the worst thing I could possibly do is go back and talk to my old T. She said that I would just get hurt again. I want to ask my old T questions. I'd like to know why she reacted the way she did. I want...Read More...