I will definitely look into that one. Thanks for recommending it, STRM! SGRead More...

((((DF)))) So funny. I always think that so many people have it easier than me, lots easier. I'm sure it's not true but I have that in my head. Things come easier to them. All sorts of things. But it seems like all the important things I'm bad at. Relationships, organizational skills, etc. So if struggle is the mark of success, why do you want your past obliterated? Sorry you are having a difficult time with this. xoxo LieseRead More...

Someone, I know how much it hurts and how bad the rejection feels. My T doesn't hug or hold hands either. I went through a long period when I felt as though I just wanted to hire someone to hold me while I cry, that that would be sooo healing. Now I can kind of stand back a little and just feel a bit sad that's it's something I can't have right now. It feels too vulnerable to ask. Maybe when you feel a little less vulnerable you can bring it up. But you shouldn't worry about your T shifting...Read More...

((Stuck)) Thanks so much for sharing in my thread. I have never once thought that about your posts, but I can understand projecting that sort of thing, because I do it literally all the time. I really appreciate you visiting my thread and also you recommending the book. I find it hard to describe myself as shy, because when I say that I am shy or anti-social, every single person I have told that to, without exception, tells me I'm not or gives me a confused look. I guess, because I can be...Read More...

GG, I know its not easy to consider looking for a new T and I also know that the thought of being abandoned by T is even scarier....but it really sounds like she has already abandoned you, and continues to do so, in so many ways. You are in this ongoing painful reenactment of abandonment with your T. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to start looking for another T, to have one in place as a possibility just in case things do not work out with T. You might find in your search for a new T that there are...Read More...

Way to go LG - that is fab newsRead More...

Hello HBshadow Can totally relate to your struggle to talk. My T is perfectly okay with silence and she doesn't try to fill the silence by talking with when I go quiet; which takes some pressure off us both. She says that it is okay to be quiet sometimes and just be together without words being necessary. Also writing has helped with being able to talk sometimes and not always every session even 6 months down the line. She also sticks a post it note and pencil down on my chair so if I can't...Read More...

Lovely to see you again jill, good to hear things are going well.Read More...

This is really interesting to me and I can relate. Sometimes other people change (like your mom) and they can be in tune with your needs - even in they are not expressed. Sometimes, those people that change slip back into their old ways and it may feel all too familiar. I am trying to be in the moment without judging it or trying to figure it out. Maybe that will help you a little bit because there really isn't an answer. It is moment to moment. Hope this helps.Read More...

Incognito, I'm glad you were able to talk to your T and that you are feeling better about your session over time. You are facing a long break, but I'm glad you will have the phone sessions. I hope you have a wonderful vacation.Read More...

Well- it was Appointment day. I didn't admit to the flowers during session. But, I sent her a quick note telling her about it. We will see how our next session goes next week. Today was such a good session-- we discussed us, which I needed. She reassured me that we are working together but that it's ultimately up to me-- and she thinks I'll be the one who comes to her and says "I think it's time for me to go." She mentioned that my case is long term therapy-- I could take my time but I...Read More...

That's another great idea. I haven't gotten to read a book for fun in quite a while, because I am a sit down and read for hours type of reader and Boo never gives me that luxury. I feel the sudden need to visit a bookstore! I'm a little bit proud of me, but also still freaked out, because so far the whole boundaries thing hasn't been such an easy ride. Who would have thought, LOL!Read More...

Yep. I know what you mean. I've gotten myself into quite the pickle in this situation. It's been 16 years since my first T left (literally, moved out of the country) and I still have fleeting moments of longing for her. I was a lost teen who had been seeing her for a year and a half, and while I didn't feel attached then, once she was gone, I was heartbroken. I often searched to see if she was back in town and practicing again, but after 5 years of no luck, I had to find a new T. While I...Read More...

SG, You are a very loving person to have ached like that for your daughter and to have made the effort to protect her. The way it ended up surely must be an example of good karma that deservedly came your way.Read More...

Thanks to all of you. I still feel dumb but that's ok. We talked a little about how I am feeling and I said I'm not happy. She asked me if I thought I was that bad. I said not bad but just not happy. She asked if I wished I could feel happier and I said yes. I just don't see it happening. I keep telling myself that I have no real reason to be unhappy. I have a pretty good life and I should be happy. I'm just not. I just feel down most of the time. I don't really care what happens. I don't...Read More...

DF, it sounds to me like it means you don't feel safe as far as confidentiality or anonymity goes. Or perhaps the safety feeling is related to things you have told DBT T about your ex that seem like too much info to have shared? Is that possible?Read More...

Retrogal, LG and Justmaybe, Glad you liked it. Retrogal, your story is so inspiring. I hope I can get to where you are one day. I'm glad you finally feel free to be yourself. Justmaybe, I'm glad it fills you with some glimmer of hope. Take care of yourself as you wade through that stuff with your T.Read More...

((((Draggles)))) pcd thank you and heaps of s and lots of love to you and your inner family and your outer family! Here always! M xxRead More...

((((Draggers)))) thanks for the hugs and well-wishes!Read More...

LL, This sounds really interesting. I have to read it.Read More...

Neither do i!!!!Read More...

Ok, so i am back to get some honest feedback about this situation. Last night, the counselor concluded that a panic attack which is the result of my husband's PTSD is what caused his rage the other day. Her solution is that he needs to see the dr again and discuss his anti-anxiety meds again... which I took away and hid, because he was overdosing on these and then drinking on top of that. He has real trust issues with psychologists and psychiatrists etc... so... this makes me feel like the...Read More...

Beautiful songs, Draggers! The One by Gary Allan: No rush though I need your touch I won't rush your heart Until you feel on solid ground Until your strength is found, girl I'll fill those canyons in your soul Like a river lead you home And I'll walk a step behind In the shadows so you shine Just ask it will be done And I will prove my love Until you're sure that I'm "the one" Somebody else was here before He treated you unkind And broken wings need time to heal Before a heart can fly, girl...Read More...

I never really did the processing you guys do with my T, cause I don't have a lot of invasive memories or anything- but I remember distinctly the sensation of being sooooo sleepy in response to...what? I have no idea. It happened at times with my SD too. Like instantly- just a very strong desire to fall asleep. strange. I also have the supermarket zombie disease. haha, I avoid shopping because it is inevitable, and my H won't even *let* me go in alone anymore, because I will be found...Read More...