Great to see you posting, LL. Your T sounds lovely. My T's office isn't all that big - there's a couch and her chair and another off to the side (but that also seems to mainly be for "empty chair" exercises and such). I've sat on the floor a few times, and T has sat on the floor with me every time. The only time I sit on the floor, though, is if I feel like I need to curl up because of some intense emotion and I've asked T if she would put her arm around me. The reason that doesn't happen...Read More...

thanks so much everyone. Your acceptance of me in this has helped me have more courage to accept myself and face this. I find that today, it's like I want to hide from the fact that I posted about this and that it is going on for me now! Yes, I want to hide from the hiding. shiesh. But I'm not going to. I think I'm going to ask my T if there is something we can do to explore this more... Maybe find something I can do with my hands with the intention to focus on this stuff. I love the pottery...Read More...

LG, So sorry to hear about your friend. (((hugs)))Read More...

((((Sadly))) I wish I could say more - my brain is fried - but I will for sure be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers while you are away on your trip to India, especially since that is where you went through awful abuse and pain... I can understand about craving and grieving that kind of comfort of being held. (maybe it's not all lost... can I ask, what about your H? oh, I'm sure you have gone there already.) Yay! you deserve such a good T after all you have been through. I'm also glad...Read More...

Beebs, Thinking of you. LieseRead More...

Yaku, How beautiful!Read More...

DF: Oooh, we have tons of Tinker Toys at my house! I've got boys. I hope you have fun with them and you managed to get some sleep. PF: I've heard of Kinder chocolate and I hear it is really good. Wow, no candy?! I wish I didn't like it. Oh stuffed animals in the bed...yes, I have a stuffed kitty.Read More...

Thanks AG!Read More...

Hello Smiley I’ve been off forum for quite a while now and I see you haven’t posted for ages. I hope you are still hanging in there, and maybe if you are still reading drop in here and say hi, let us know how you’re doing? Hugs to you (((( Smiley )))) LLRead More...

Still thinking of you. I've been imagining all evening what it would be like to be held by someone I could trust, held and count on it not to turn into something violating. I want so badly to just be wrapped up in someone else's care. I'm feeling really connected to your sense of mourning right now. I hope you're doing OK. (((((hugs)))))Read More...

A mean part of me wants to unfriend him, but that is so lame. So, I will just keep my mouth shut. I will never tell him I feel abandoned. His Dad walked away from their family and remarried and prioritized his new family. He completely screwed over my grandmother (the one I was so attached to) and 90% of the family won't even speak with my grandfather...including my dad. Is it stupid that, despite feeling injured, I care about how much it would hurt my father to feel like he had done the...Read More...

Hi Liese! I have trouble forming relationships with people too… that’s pretty much my main problem. To answer your question about how you talk about that, I’ll give you some examples from my therapy, I don’t know if it would be the same for you, but maybe it would give you somewhere to start or something concrete. We talk (or actually my T talks) a lot about my ‘style relate’- meaning the way I relate to everyone, including him. For example two sessions ago my T was explaining something and...Read More...

Jones: "I also think there are many important reasons a therapist will say 'hey, it's time to look at the relationship', and there are many complex things that happen inside clients when they do say that - including our avoidant attachment patterns." I think this applies to my situation. It helps to have words on it. Excellent points, Jones and TN and STRMS- You guys know that I'm dealing with this kind of issue in my therapy right now. My take has been that it's just not the same for every...Read More...

apparently my grandfather, whom I never knew- was well-acquainted with Walt Disney and even received some valuable gift from him of a couple of the first frames of "Snow White!" I wish I had them now, to pay for all my therapy expenses...ahhh...unlimited sessions! Say hello to Walt for us, BG!Read More...

Thank you everyone! The showcase was spectacular - all the kids were absolutely amazing and I was so proud of them! The birthday was... My students made it very special by having a little surprise party for me, which was very sweet. It was kind of sad, though, that while I put on a happy face for them and all their efforts (ten year olds planning a party and keeping it a surprise is a challenging feat!) I really could not let their joy in. Worked on it with my T and have uncovered some yucky...Read More...

(((((FROSTY)))))Read More...

Yaku, I struggle with asking for too much too. And, I worry about my T moving things around for me to accommodate me. It feels like too much. But the truth of the matter is, that I am so flooded right now, like you, and I really need the extra emotional support. I feel so much better knowing it's in place. My life runs smoother. It's one less thing to worry about. I am so glad you asked for what you wanted even though it was hard to do and it's hard to accept!!!Read More...

she seems to be a very attuned T...love it. Thanks for sharing R2G!Read More...

How did I miss out on all the fun going on in here? good thing my fam is in bed, I'm laughing pretty hard at some of your comments! anybody read the book "potatoes not prozac?" Eggs are gooooood, LG. What's wrong with the yolks? but seriously...pickle relish in deviled eggs? It can't be. DF, if you are laying in bed awake, worrying about your eggs...I suggest you do the crepe thing. mmmmmmmmm. Roll it up, with bacon and cheese. (BB impersonates Homer Simpson gargling...)Read More...

Thanks, STRM. I'm doing OK now. I realized even if I don't get to talk to T, our family is doing dinner with our pastor's family tomorrow night. If H is up for putting our daughter to bed again, I may take separate cars and hang out and talk with them a while. It has been a while since I updated them on how things are going (other than brief responses to them checking in on me).Read More...

Hi Liese, This is actually a really complex question - it's not surprising it feels confusing. Does your T tell you directly that he doesn't bring up issues unless the client brings them op themselves? There could be all kinds of reasons why a T would deal only with the presenting problem: 1) They don't know there are other problems (remember Ts are *not* psychic, despite sometimes seeming that way) 2) They don't feel the client is ready to look at the bigger/deeper problems 3) They feel the...Read More...

I think perhaps T is just making sure the transference doesn't turn into erotic transference. Perhaps she's had experience in the past where a client misinterpreted a hug. Anyway, I think this has little to do with you and has more to do with her not wanting to feel as though she is sending the wrong messages.Read More...

Thanks for all the replies. The session was today. I am still very tearful- still very mixed. I asked about seeing him privately and he said he isnt allowed to see ones privately that he has seen else where- kind of as I thought I managed to pluck up the courage to ask him about the best type of therapy for abuse and he has said face to face stuff- he said that would obviously have to be with someone I trusted - which I used as lead in to ask about his private practice. I dont think the fact...Read More...

I'm so glad the mediator affirmed that you deserve to be treated better! I am sorry it is such an unnecessarily complicated process and that the insurance company seems to see this as an opportunity to undermine you further. I hope as you recover from the stress of the experience, you will be able to hold onto the fact that objectively, YOU DESERVE TO BE TREATED WITH RESPECT and you deserve the care you are receiving. The fact that you were able to make it through this meeting shows that you...Read More...