Hello Heather (Chimes in) I'm new too! Just want to say welcome and that I'm looking forward to reading your posts. LamplighterRead More...

DH = dear husbandRead More...

LMAO!! Those are great, JaneDoe. Thanks!Read More...

Hi SG...yeah those things that he told me about being me and knowing myself were really powerful statements and I keep thinking about them. Trouble is... I don't know who I am. I've always been so busy trying to be what my mother wanted me to be, or what my boss expects me to be, or what my husbands thinks I should be that I have never taken the time to know who I am and what I want. I guess this is something I'm always working on in therapy. Maybe not in a focused way but it's there in the...Read More...

Yes i agree- that is beautiful. I read this one- I think somewhere on this site: Learn from yesterday Live for today Hope for a brighter tomorrow At least I think that was it. Be WellRead More...

Too funny, Monte! So...I'm wondering, how did you answer that one? I have a similar fear...for years I went to AA meetings, where the convention is, before you start talking, you say "Hi I'm so-and-so and I'm an alcoholic" and everyone says "Hi so-and-so". Whenever I'm at a work meeting I have to be careful not to say this when I have something to say...so far it hasn't happened...that would be reeeeaaaaallllly embarrassing! SGRead More...

Thank you both I think you have helped me a lot.Read More...

Hello there Amazon Thanks so much for replying. Lots of questions! I have no idea. I think I just assumed from reading the posts on forum generally that a lot of people seem pretty clear that their therapist does care, and it struck me as something I have no idea about but it seems important. You know you could be right in your last comment - maybe therapy IS all about experiencing someone who does care, in a ‘proper’ way, so we can take that experience and make it real. Don’t know, just...Read More...

Hi SG, Play the Lotto!! The stars have to be aligned in your favor if an insurance company came through! I am SO happy that you can now see your wonderful new T worry free! AGRead More...

Hi Dolphinac thank you for your hugs, and for reminding me that I am the expert on me. Yes it is distressing to feel so strongly about him, if I could stop caring I would, I just don't know how to stop. I love this site too and I am so thankful for each and every person too. Hi Amazon, I guess things are a bit on track but I am still obsessing more than ever. I only see him once a month which makes it easier to cope with him but I am still obsessing. New P is fabulous. Has the boundaries and...Read More...

my p believes i have not got bipolar 2. she says it is depression and anxiety with a couple of traits of bpd. i agree with this where i believe that there can be traits in all of us on the planet! i have not had a chance to understand everything completely yet i am beginning to make a lot of connections. college and cbt is helping that alongside talking more openly to my cpn and my husband. a big prt of me is on the mend i think yet there is another part of me which feels that it will all...Read More...

You are right- It was the Pope. =)Read More...

thanks monte I don't think I am handling it so well this weekend... but thank you for the prayers and good thoughts humor is indeed a very good release valve for meRead More...

Monte: I am vacillating between a letter beforehand and just having one to give her when I get there if I can't think on my feet. But the way you put it, about certain expressions from her and how that might make me react to her reactions, causes me to think I might just be better off sending her a letter sometime this week so she has some time to think about whether or not she can deal with me and prepare herself to respond, etc. Ugh...I hate these kinds of agonizing decisions!!! Thanks for...Read More...

Thanks monte, I try not to worry and obsess to much about it. I still want my therapist. I can't imagine I would give up on this relationship for any other guy that would come up. The situation with your husband, I think I had this kind of expectation as well. This dream of true love that will make me absolutely happy. I understand that no man will ever make me happy if I don't learn it myself and if I don't learn what love is. Yeah, I would have a sense of loss if my erotic feelings were...Read More...

Monte and Pippi, I agree with you both. If I would put as much focus and energy/effort into my relationship with God as I do with my T, I would probably (no, I WOULD) be a whole lot healthier and better off than I am now. I just don't know how to apply that knowledge to making it happen and getting myself off of my T. It sucks...Read More...

Hi all... Fluoxetine is the generic equivalent of Prozac....same thing. It does help lots of people....but I think it is pretty rare that an anti-depressant alone will actually resolve anyones issues. I believe that most of the drugs prescribed are to alleviate symptoms...they are not "the cure" or solution to the deeper problems that we experience. Yes...some people can have pure chemical imbalances that respond to these drugs, but that is usually the exception...and not the rule. I was on...Read More...

Thanks for your explanation, True North. Dharma, I too feel like I have some OCD issues, only it's with certain people. Most recently with my T, but with a physical therapist, 4 teachers, my husband, and some friends in the past. It sucks to have your life overwhelmed with intense and obsessive thoughts and feelings and compulsive behaviors (mine are "talking" to my T out loud in the bathroom or when no one is around, or searching things about her online, writing her letters in my notebook,...Read More...

Hello Starfish and thanks for your comments and welcome. Have to admit that I’m glad you commented on the first words my former T said to me - my own sense of it all is (STILL) oh it’s not that bad I’m making a big meal of it I know what she really meant - never mind that I am still impotently FURIOUS about it (and this after 24 years!) I think it’s that I’m so used to expecting people to say that my perceptions of things are wrong or incorrect that it floors me when people actually see what...Read More...

Incognito, I am so with you on this one. It never fails to amaze me that nothing is really changed but to have my T hear me and understand me, and often help me to understand myself is immensely healing. It seems that for human beings being heard and understood is MUCH more important for us than actually having things our way. Which is good because you can always be understood but you most definitely can't always have things be the way you want them. And may I join (the very wise!) CT in...Read More...

Hi MH, Sorry, I forget that newer posters might not know about the HTML slapper. It's a device we came up with a while ago that started as something to hit someone with if they were being too hard on themselves and kind of evolved into a general punishment kind of thing. I didn't mean for you to use it on you at all. I was afraid that what I was saying would be difficult to hear and you'd want to hit me for which you would need the slapper. It's really good that you are crying out against...Read More...

Hi Allison, I'm sorry to hear that you are having such a rough time in life. I wish there was more that we could do for you here, but it sounds like you need to find someone who can do more for you than just listen. You are young, in a destructive relationship, have health problems, and don't have support at home- that is no doubt an extremely difficult place to be. Can you contact a counselor at school and tell him/her what all is going on? This is too much stress for you, and we aren't...Read More...

Thanks everybody…your replies gave me a lot to think about. Echo...thanks for waxing poetic!...although I hope to get better before I degenerate into "uncontrollable savagery"...how about "controlled churlishness"...or "measured moodiness"... Monte...Maybe your stray kitty and my wet puppy can keep each other company I do think the message is something we got very early on...I don’t remember ever expecting my mom to treat me any differently...but I have the feeling that if I ever do connect...Read More...

Wow- now i know how I missed this incredible thread-notifications off. My mind is reeling with all of the wonderful wise information on this thread. It is great to see how this stuff works. So many of you are so knowledgeable about therapy. AG- you always amaze me. I have had 15 months of therapy, and already I am thinking about leaving. Every concieveable way I've thought about this topic (thinking I am so original)has been expressed on this thread. I guess perhaps I am still running, and...Read More...