I had my session this week. It went fairly well. Since it had been 3 weeks since the last one it was like we had to play catch up (get re-aquainted) for the first 10 minutes. Then I started on a few things not totally deep, but deeper than chit chat. I didn't get to the deep stuff until we were close to done. ugh. I told T I was trying to decide if I wanted to share certain things or not. She asked why I felt like I couldn't share. I said it was due to time and due to subject matter being...Read More...

I have a question, are you trying to stop drinking, and if so how long have you been sober? I was taught to stay away from slippery places in my first year of sobriety. If you are dreading going on a vacation with drinkers, then follow your gut feeling and do not go. Vacations are supposed to be fun, and you are supposed to look forward to them not dread them. What kind of a vacation is a giant drinkfest where the point is to be drunk, not present in the moment? It looks like you managed to...Read More...

Yakusoku, THis thread is old but I will post anyways. If you think you should stop drinking, and you still have great desires to drink then you should follow your gut and stop drinking. Stop before your drinking becomes a habit you can't and won't want to stop. I stop smoking before I became addicted. Sure I like to smoke and I sometimes miss it, but I started to crave smoking, was smoking more frequently, I would think about smoking and looked forward to smoking breaks. I am glad I stopped...Read More...

Functioning is not living. If you are serious about stopping using, there is a lot of support to help you quit, there is even a 12 step program, Marijuana Anonymous. I have found forums for people trying to quit as well, you do not have to do this alone and you deserve to be happy. Start living life on life's terms, you will be a better person because of it.Read More...

((erica)) Welcome! I've gone through periods of not feeling validated by my therapist's too and I've raised fuss. I think as far as validation goes, at least w/ my Ts, they validate what I'm feeling or why I might be feeling that way. Where I think saying the opposite of what I'm saying would be comforting/reassuring rather than validating the 'core' issue. I guess my Ts work like NavyMe's - they do the body stuff too. I think Ts try to tell us the opposite of our negative feelings about...Read More...

((( Athenacus ))) sorry about all of it, can particularly relate to the "ex" stuff, but all of it sucks. sorry about the courses. ugh! you're not whining, you're just un-winding ... that's a good thing! i hope thing are looking better tomorrow! hugs!Read More...

I think you are OK, perhaps we both are? LOL. Me too. We seem to be harsh on ourselves!Read More...

Thank you so much for replying. It really helps to have some perspective! B2W you do make some great points. I strive to be forgiving and I act like I am but I guess I am just not ready. It feels like I am putting a lid on myself and my fears and my actual concrete experience (I literally have a 12 year old me in my head going 'what the hell are you doing?') and giving my daughter to her in an act of trust that is not genuine. But I am 100% willing to praise her for how far she has come and...Read More...

Aw TN...so glad you are feeling better! I can kinda relate because when my T remembers stuff we talked about, it's always a bit of a jolt. I used to wish that old T would remeber stuff, so I wouldn't have to tell it over again to remind him, which I hated very much. Now I have the opposite problem...can't get away with anything because T remembers stuff which I'm starting to realize. yikes. Anyway...glad your T is so nice to you. You need and deserve kindness. hugs, BBRead More...

I'm going to post my long-winded reply in a separate thread. Somewhat related to the book, but I didn't want to get too far off track. Those books have helped me very, very much in arriving at the place of peace I am (almost) at now.Read More...

I just finished this book and I loved it. Lots of fun, and insightful, too.Read More...

BorntoWrite, You are a very inspiring writer! Your heart and soul illuminate your words. (((Liese)))), I hope you find self acceptance one day...Read More...

Thanks puppet and cd...you are right. safe distance always helps...I'm working on it, but man it is an uphill battle!... hugs you guys, BeebsRead More...

((((janedoe)))) I just really don't know what to say. The actions of that insurance company are so illegal and nonsensical it makes my head spin. Like I really do not understand why they would care at all about your T. It makes no freaking sense. And so I want to tell you get a lawyer and fight, fight, fight, because what they are doing is so wrong. But I can also understand you just wanting this over with, especially with all the crap you've been dealing with recently, so if your T won't...Read More...

Athenacus, BB and puppet, thanks for chiming in, I can use all the the help I can get. I am extremely attached to my T. Probably too damn much for my own good. Could be part of my problem. I really hate asking for anything from anybody. I pretty much believe in paying my way, and I would feel really awful having to ask for a discount. It is so against my nature. If I do and she says yes, could she possibly feel resentment?I don't think I am a very easy client. She has told me that I am a...Read More...

Erica and Athenacus - I'm so jealous! I only completed my BA in psych before starting a family, but I may go back one day! I love the subject so much!! Been thinking about my beloved T reading here. I said earlier that he knows I come here and that I really don't think he would take the time to check it out, but yeesh, not sure I like that kind of gamble! Under the cloak of anonymity, I say more here than I do to him, particularly in certain threads. Just not ready for certain things to come...Read More...

Thank you Closed Doors!Read More...

Navy Me. I can relate so well to what you have experienced. Early on in my therapy I took hold of T's hand without asking first and kissed it as my way of saying thank you for the session. I beat myself into a frenzy over what I had done and e-mailed her the next day to apologise, and even to say I would understand if she did't wish to see me any longer. T replied at once to say "Don't worry, you haven't done anything wrong". She now accepts that this is just my way of saying goodbye to her...Read More...

Thanks (((Cat))) and (((Liese))) I'm just trying to breathe through each minute. It's like treading water, which though I am good at doing, my record is just over two hours, and now I'm pushing two days. Sleep makes everything better. So does Xanax. This too shall pass, right?!Read More...

Congratulations discoveringme!!! That´s BIG achievement - LittlemeRead More...

Yep, totally me, too. It's terrible. I'm so sorry you have it too, but glad to know I'm not alone!Read More...

I liked it! It is very interesting and thoughtful. I like your pictures, fun! and they complimented your text nicely and were humorous. :0D Editing is fun, yes? I love television and cut a number of projects too. As one editor to another I would like to make a technical suggestion, ( I am not trying to bash on your video) shorten the time the slides are on screen. They felt a little long and I believe the longer clips slow the video down. That was just my feeling. I look forward to seeing...Read More...

I know how you feel. I yelled at my first shrink the he did nothing, and I wanted to hit him too. My current T has endured a lot of abuse too. I also wanted to hit her. I told her this and she looked a little concerned, I have a history of being VERY aggressive. My psych said to me during one of my visits I was making good progress in my therapy. Really? I asked what does that mean? He told me I was much calmer and I didn't worry as much. Really? I asked my therapist what does it mean I am...Read More...

This topic was posted awhile ago but, I would like to respond in case anyone else reads this post. Before I started my recovery, codependence is one of the problems, I put up with a lot of BS in relationships and dished out a lot of BS myself: he cheated, I cheated, I was in open relationships ( a least I thought they were open), one guy even married a woman behind my back and I STILL kept seeing him. I now realize my fears which were: I will not find another, this is the best I could do,...Read More...

Thanks, AG. Even though I said I knew that she didn't mean it the way I took it, seeing your explanation of why she wanted me to attach to others makes me realize that even my own rational explanation was just finding another way to blame myself for feeling the way I do (if anything I just wrote makes sense). The thing that will stick with me the most is something she said that showed me she understood the weight of what I was telling her. She said that even if her plane drops out of the sky...Read More...